My wife is very hot tempered and she like to hit me when she lose her temper. She will dig her fingernail into my skin and sometimes she will slam my head against the wall. I don't want to hit her back. I love her. I believe she loves me too. How can I calm her down. And stop her from abusing me like this.

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Sorry to say but it doesn’t look like being ‘hot tempered,’ this seems more akin to domestic violence. I would suggest confronting your wife about it. Usually people who express their anger through violent behaviour are unable to express it any other way. But that does not mean there is no other way. Please speak with your partner about the things that make her violently angry and tell her how much it hurts you to see her this way. You must also tell her about the physical pain it causes you and ask her to be empathetic and put herself in your shoes. More often than not you will realise that direct confrontation scares those who express emotions in an extreme manner because they are unable t confront their own demons. If this has been going on for quite a while, staying silent is not good for you or for her. If you really wish to see her calm and content, speak to her. Better yet, attend a counselling session and understand why she is hurting. I wish you both the best.

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Oh dear, I'm so sorry this is happening to you. When someone says domestic abuse, they always equate it to husbands abusing wives but the opposite happens too and unfortunately, not talked about alot because of social stigma, gender roles etc. I suggest you try talking to your wife about this when she is calm. Approach the topic lightly since she is hot tempered, find out the source of her anger. Let her know how much it hurts when she hits you and suggest to talk it out instead. If things get too out of control, maybe you can get a third party to help? A close, trusted family member or even a family counsellor? There could be some underlying deep seeded reason to your wife's anger and abusive ways... http://sg.theasianparent.com/high-earning-wives-abuse-husbands/

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Maybe have a serious talk(open mind)with her about the relationship between you and your wife, ask her about how she feels or general questions about living married life and so on it might help. After hard times with the baby and other problems I recognize myself become a very angry person and use a lot of bad words that I never like to use it so I decided to have a serious talk(open mind)with my husband and we have a talk every month about living and life and so on to make sure that we will go along together no matter what. It’s really help me and my husband I hope it help you too. I’m sure if you love each other you two will find situation 🤞

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It sounds like she has some anger management issue. Have a chat with her when she is calm. She need to first recognize that it is a problem and be willing to take action to remedy it. I'm really sorry to hear that you are going through this and respect you for not retaliating. You can refer her to seek professional help once she is open to that option: http://scc.sg/eng/index.php/angermanagement/ Here's a brochure that you could show her to broach the subject: https://www.imh.com.sg/uploadedFiles/Publications/Educational_Resources/Anger%20Management.pdf Take care of yourself!

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She has a real temper problem. This is basically abuse. You have been very good about this whole thing. Find out whats the root cause of her temper. Sometimes there might be a hormonal imbalance. Go see a TCM doctor for some herbs to calm her down. In Chinese we believe that anger originates from the liver. So she must regulate the liver to calm it down using certain Acupuncture points, and herbal formulae that specifically and very effectively help the Liver to free up its energy, and flow like a river again, to great relief. Also try meditation.

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Hey man, I know it’s tough, but this is very normal. Hormones, and all kinds of worries, her own thoughts on pregnancy etc. You have to see it from her point of view. The stress of all that is happening is more than you and I would ever be able to understand. Look, you can take it. She is YOUR wife and no one else’s, that means you are the one chosen to take of her and it also means you can do it. Just hang in there man, it will get so beautiful very soon. Patience bro, just a whole lot of patience. Here for you, praying for you

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2y ago

Such a great advice. Hope it helped !!!

Please seek help, it is very important. People dont realize that mental health is the key to everything. Rather they criticise and have made it a stigma in Singapore with their ignorance. It takes a lot of courage to seek help. Mental health is just like our health issue. If you are sick, you will see a doctor right? Please, if you need more advise or help, ill be willing to share and advise further. I have walked through the path of mental health, i truly know and understand. People do not under and will not unless they have a close one who is suffering.

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Sorry to hear that. As the saying goes, you don't fight fire with fire. So, you're doing a great job at staying calm. But at the same time, don't let her take her anger out on you. When she gets angry, you need to reason out with her. She will have a hard time to do it but you can make it clear that you're not going to take the abuse, and you want to understand her feelings but if she's going to react on her emotions, you're not going to get involved. That should give her time to think through about what she's about to do and hopefully, help your relationship.

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sorry to hear that. you are a very patient and loving husband. many would have retaliated without second thoughts. I have been through violent relationships and have been abused physically so I understand how you feel. she has some anger management and insecurity issues? it will be good to try to bring up the topic when her mood is good, however it might trigger to a fight. maybe you can write a letter to her and tell her how you feel? its a softer approach as face to face is always power struggle at the end due to ego.

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in my opinion ung behavior kasi minsan kung pano natin sila pkisamahan. bka kasi nasanay na sya na ganun o may dahilan tlga sya para mka pag react sya ng ganun. in my case kasi, simula palang ng relationship nmin kht nag aaway kami, never kami nag sigawan , murahan o sakitan ng bf ko pa sya.. kaya ngayong naging mag asawa kami, i caught him cheating pero kht isang sampal o mura diko nagawa sa knya. kaya sobra daw syang nagsisisi. and hopefully totoo tlaga ung pagbabago na pinapakita nya

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