Sometimes, I feel very hopeless. My husband & me r getting more & more distant. Ever since we have our son, his focus is forever about son & himself only. I'm feeling more like an outsider. Whenever son cries, he will first to blame me. After son is born, we only have 1 time sex. And that's becos he doesn't want to anymore. Whenever he has the time, it will be playing games on laptop. I've stopped talking to my mil as we have too many conflicts handling my son since born. And definitely affect my marriage life. I've getting very hopeless in this marriage & family. If husband has no heart & effort to salvage the relationship, it can't only be me one-sided right? I've seriously think of divorce several times but hang on due to dear son. But it's getting v difficult to hang on. Have u ever regretted marrying? I'm really envious of others whose husband who focus on them before children.

The first year post a baby is the toughest on a relationship. It is a testing time. But there is nothing that cannot be solved with open and honest communication. You must tell your husband how you feel and why it’s important at this stage for the two of you to act like a team and not like competition. Tell him that you need his support and care at this crucial juncture. And you are struggling to find hope in this relationship. Hear him out and see how he feels. He might be going through the same without sharing too. Most importantly be considerate to your and his feelings as well and try to come up with a solution that works for both of you. As for your MiL, there is nothing to think about. If she hasn’t been your support when you needed it the most, she won’t be now as well. So just develop a thick skin and work it out with your husband.

I think it's normal to feel different from what it used to be before having a baby. I too felt at times that my husband was so attentive to our LO whereas no longer so attentive to me. on a brighter side, at least he loves our LO. Communication is very important in any relationship. Guys tends to be less open up on their relationship. i "complained" to my husband that i felt that he doesnt care abt me as much as he treating our LO. He explained that he does care about me.. and that statement had actually hurt him... if i never open up to him, i will not know how is he feeling too. and i could have just continue to misunderstood him. To be fair to your husband, have a good chat with him. perhaps have your LO to be taken care by your parents or PIL for a while, while the both of you go out, have some nice meal and a good chat.

You need to talk to him be straight forward but be kind and tender. Be honest but be sensitive this is new for him too. You may have created a wedge that you didn't mean to in purpose but cutting off his mom, I don't know what she did to you, but if he and his mom are close this will most definitely affect your relationship. His relationship with you may be extremely important to him but his mother is still his mother..if they have a good relationship he will see you as the bad guy before her unless he is mad at her too. You have to talk through these things and try your best to make things work. Most in laws don't get a long as well as they'd like but at the end of the day it was the family you chose so you gotta try your best to make it work and if it still doesn't work then yes, move on!!

You have to knock the sense out of him. Sometimes there's a thin line between being a numb and being dumb, i hope your husband is not both. You have endured soooooo much! Having to go through pregnancy, labor, post partum recovery, your in laws' crap, breastfeeding and taking care of your baby and your husband and this is how he will repay you? It's infuriating. You need to have a serious heart to heart talk with your husband. Let him tell you directly why he's acting like he's the one with the post partum depression here. Tell him how you feel, let him feel your frustrations, anger and anxieties. There is a reason and you have the right to know that in order for your relationship to work. Don't be a martyr. Self love goes a long way.

Please try to find a right time to talk to him and tell him how you honestly feel, not in an angry or confrontational way but in a mild and objective manner, and let him know how you're hurting. And try to find out the reason why he's treating you this way. If it's difficult to get him to open up to you, try to get a third party both of you trust (maybe his or your close sibling/friend?) to act as mediator. And yes, please don't ever mention divorce to him if you can't bear the thought of separating; I did that in a moment of anger to my husband and it got really bad. Hope both of you can have a good talk to clear the air and things get better from there! Hug.

How were things like before you got pregnant? Can feel your frustration especially when it seemed like you are the only one putting in the effort. Have you tried talking to him to find out why he is acting so distant? I would suggest going for marriage counseling if you and your husband is open to the idea. Even if not, one key point would be to get him to realise that this is an issue to tackle. Not sure if he is aware of your feelings so I think it is best for you to speak to him before making any rash decision. Hope everything works out for you! Take care!

I'm sorry to hear this :( I honestly feel that you two should talk things out. If he doesn't want to listen, then make him listen. If you have to show some emotions for him to listen, then do that. If the both of you continue to keep your feelings bottled up, it's just going to make things worst. Children are supposed to bring a family together not cause the parents to drift. Have your husband talk to you, discuss things out, tell him it's for the sake of your child. I wish you well and stay strong, Mommy.

Most of the advise from mums are good, but I wish to caution 2 things. 1. Never talk about divorce to your husband unless you are ready to go through with it. (Same as don't point a gun at someone unless you are ready to fire) 2. Never wage war with your MIL, because she bring up your husband for 20~30 year. Is unlike he will side you on the long run. Why I said the above? Because my wife did the above 2 and we are separated with 1 kid.

There is a saying that to get to a man's heart is through the stomach. Make a special dinner for the family? I guess sometimes being proactive helps a lot. Men in general needs a bit of nudging, and needs tender loving care more than a woman at times. Such care and concern will soften him and then you can lightly chat about how you feel, about the distance. And how you both can work things out better. Don't give up, be positive.

The 1st few years of marriage n having a child is the toughest period in a relationship.It was difficult.u n ur partner still adapting to the new life with a child.but trust me it will get better if u n ur husbnd willing to talk.my only child is 10 now.and we still together after 12 years of marriage despite we fought a lot back then.soon we're going to have another baby.try to calm down and always be positive.