My husband has been caught using tinder by my friends and i even found alot evidence matching to him using tinder. Found ss photos of the tinder girls on his “screenshot” folder, the day he used the photo the dates all match up to when i caught him using, otp of tinder to log in or something, emails flooded with tinder promotional emails ever since that month which i caught him using. Have talked to him the previous time when i didnt had much evidence, was blamed on scolded on and even manipulated. Forgave him and kept quiet, yesterday was such a hectic day just cant stand his attitude getting worse on me. So i checked his phone, became sherlock and found all those extra details. All layed out nicely that he did use tinder, but he kept denying and even shouted and screamed at me for disrespecting him to checking his phone. He say even if im his wife i have no rights to check his phone at all. Tbh i dont even check his phone or anything. But yesterday my friend suggested it cause of similar scenarios. I checked once and already kena so bad. Blamed, shouted, screamed, manipulated all saying he did not use!! And only kept lying to himself and everyone around us. Thanks for reading, any mummies felt the same way?

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Sorry that how you are feeling. I was in that shoes where i literally keep quiet and do my own things. When i confronted him, mother fucker jump to conclusions and blaming me for all. When i sleeps, i unlock his password to check, all the messages i read its coming from his colleagues in which both hving affair. I intiated to have intimacy, he declined. So where is the trust?? He has verbally abused his words to the extend i cant take it. He left house and my child just to stay with mistress. He did not show up for 1 year. Until i message him lets end this marriages because there is no meaning. Even i intiated marriage counselling, all not bothered. I am just sick and tired. Finally i m a divorcee now. Very happy as i have my child that makes me strong mummy. I hoped that couples work things out. Unfortunately, mine did not. I do feel sad, emotional, but altermately you know what you want and best. Take care my dear.

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A relationship is based on love, trust and respect. Clearly all these three are being violated seriously by your husband. He can lie, manipulate, shout, get angry, accuse you back etc but all these point to a guilty person trying to hide his mistakes and misdemeanors. The question is: will you allow yourself to be treated with such disrespect? Will you allow distrust in your relationship? Will you allow yourself to be one of many woman in his life regardless if he married you and not them. Will you want your children growing up to think it is ok to treat woman that way or for your daughter to think it is ok for her to be treated that way since daddy treated mommy as such??!! If not, call the shots and do something about it. Good luck

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Super Mum

Hi Anon this is called gaslighting ie making you feel like you're in the wrong to hide his guilt and shame. It's a huge red flag in any relationship. Not sure if he has cheated physically yet but he definitely has the intention to. Plus in my view using tinder and talking to other girls is already considered emotional cheating. Can you really trust him after this? You deserve much, much better than this. I'm so sorry this happened to you but I hope you can be strong and walk away!

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VIP Member

I never faced such .. but ppl r there to passionate extramarital affairs .. always say married life boring .. I don’t understand, married life boring but extra married life enjoying ??? Don’t know when men will understand the situation of wives ..?? Good luck to u he already caught with proofs u may can take some action, coz even though tht u know abt it he is still not stopping.. so better to take some action, or go n talk with ur parents or in laws .. tc

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Your husband is doing wrong but yet finding you as the excuse for his actions, blaming you etc.. you should never give up on yourself and never believe the thought that you're a bad wife Men think that we woman married and give birth liao have no choice but to stick with them. The more we should proof that we can be strong too

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Hi, This is really wrong doing by your husband and he is clearly just trying to avoid the full scenario by lying and blaming to you. I would suggest, take a moment and think through clearly. Also discuss this with close family members if this helps , on what to do about it

Just let go and relax... Dun bother about him. Do your own things and go out with your friends. Be occupied with yourself. Paying too much attention in him make him complacent. Not worth it. Let him in turn, turn his attention in you. Come on live with pride. 💪

VIP Member

Big hugs!! Instead of all these shouting matches and all, perhaps can go out for a meal, have a good talk about it? Find out what's making him unhappy (obviously) in this marriage etc. Will he work together with you to save this marriage etc.

If u don’t care then you won’t get angry. Since marriage is based on trust. No doubt he can do anything he want as long as he don’t cross the line. Guys also like to watch porn even married. Haha but cannot stop them also.

He is guilty that is why he is reacting this way. The more u shouldn’t back down and demand for an explanation. And a plan to resolve this.

3y ago

I did.. but he kept saying is not him than awhile say it is my fault i go check his phone than i go crazy saying he use tinder all that 😔