FIL making fun of our child’s name

We recently informed my husband’s parents that we have decided on the English and Chinese names for our child. Being Chinese-ed, they complained that the English name was a mouthful, and my FIL even made fun of the Chinese name (he said that people are bound to make fun of our child in school with that name). I WAS SO FURIOUS, but decided to ignore him since my husband didn’t say anything as well. The more I thought about it, the angrier I became. I felt that he didn’t respect us enough as parents of his grandchild. I just didn’t want to rant to my husband because they are his parents after all. Anyone faced the same issue naming their child?

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Super Mum

I revealed the names of my children after birth. We registered the names, so no one can ask us to change or anything. But we did have the issue of the names being mispronounced. For my first child, my MIL couldn’t say her name properly, and I felt bad correcting her in an obvious way. Then after my child started talking, she burst out laughing whenever her grandmother pronounced her name wrongly and would make fun of the wrong name. That made my MIL learn the pronunciation properly, so I didn’t have to intervene. Heh. For my second child, it was my mum who couldn’t pronounce it. I gently corrected her multiple times. We’re getting there with the correct pronunciation 😂 Random thing... when my teacher asked my friend why his name was as such, he said something like, “I dunno! My parents are weird.” Another little girl I knew had a female variation of a common boy’s name. She was probably asked in kindergarten why her name looked/sounded like a boy’s name, so she hated her name and shouted at anyone who called her that. Basically, don’t care about what others say to you now if you really like the names you’ve chosen, but help your child embrace the names too and be proud of the names. If you do feel that your child could be teased or would be unhappy in future, then you can reconsider the names. Otherwise, if you and your little family are happy with the name, go for it!:)

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Yes some relative gave me weird glances when I told them my child name. It’s quite annoying because they r the one bugging me to tell them the name, then once they know they react like “huh why this name?” I swear it’s a very common name so I don’t understand their reaction. I just take it as to each of of their own. I just refuse to talk to them anything related about my child cos I am super done dealing with all of their questions and opinions. Anyway going forward when my other relatives ask me what’s my child name, I told them I will only reveal when my LO is born. Just heck all these annoying ppl, there r everywhere

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VIP Member

hi, mine was a bit diff. when im pregnant w my first daughter, my mother in law has a name for my baby but i alr got a name for my baby and i choose that name because have meaning and she always responded by kicking at my belly when i call her name. and my mother in law keep pestering me to change the name and when shes born, i put the name as what i want it to be and she was so furious. idk if im wrong at this but she make me feel bad for making her angry.

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2y ago

It’s your baby so it should be your day on what name to give. If mil wants to use the baby name, then she should go give birth to another baby girl herself.

Super Mum

My MIL chided me for wanting to put English name into the birth cert. she said what if my child doesn’t like the name, then cannot change anymore. Luckily my FIL sided me by saying, it’s their name, be it English or Chinese name. Everyone will have opinions. Up to you to take heart or not. If your FIL reaction is so tough on you, maybe best to consider if what he says make sense or not...

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I got my mom to pronounce the shortlisted name I chose and true enough, she mispronounced and it may be an issue for him when he's in school. I chose another name for him instead although I really liked that name. As a teacher, I've seen kids being teased of their names to the extent that they hated their names. Quite sad to see that.

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Faced similar issue. I even had the chinese name Feng shui calculated and the in-law still can make fun of it. I think it is rude. And my mil even ask can change or not. Sometimes they just nv think before they speak. U can just ignore because u are ur child mother and u made the decision. It’s not up to them to choose. Jia you!

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TapFluencer

My husband family has name list to follow, I did not follow at all, i find it unnecessary because they do not know chinese at all, so what's the point of following. We as a parent we have all the right to determine anything everything for our child, just ignore them if you think that they do not give you basic respect

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VIP Member

I can uds the annoyance, but u might want to consider alternative Chinese names. The fact that your FIL can use the name to make fun, so will his future classmates. It’s sad but it’s reality, I’m not sure if u would want your son to go through such “bullying” in future

VIP Member

My in laws are not Chinese ed. But they also make fun of every baby name that we could think. Probably they are trying to prevent the baby from being teased or bullied by friends in the future.

Quite curious, what are the names? My FIL oso made fun of LO’s name but he’s always like that so we took it a pinch of salt. He never made fun of her name anymore when his love for LO grew.

2y ago

My FIL has always been a serious, no-nonsense person. Then he pulled that joke on our kid’s name. Which wasn’t funny IMO.