husband is a smoker.

My husband is a smoker. He is a VERY HEAVY SMOKER. But, my house is a smoking free zone. I don't allow him to smoke in the house/toilet or anywhere near my house. I'm currently 28 weeks pregnant. I tend to be more breathless when i smell smoke if he is smoking in the corridor or anywhere near the house. How do i get him to understand that the smoke can actually harm my kids and myself?

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My husband is a very heavy smoker too and I can empathize if he cannot quit because I used to smoke also before I was pregnant, thus I understand the urge. He smokes outside near the hdb staircase (away from the windows) and ensures that I completely cannot smell it. When he enters the house, he will sanitize and wont come near me for awhile. At night before bed, he will change his clothes and brush his teeth to ensure I am comfortable and somehow help to minimize my contact with the tobacco particles on his body. Maybe he is aware of the effects of secondhand smoke on pregnancy and your unborn child, but doesnt know how to deal with the strong urge to smoke. Maybe you can talk to him on how to at least keep the smoke far away from you and your kids, since it’s tough for him to quit? Or cut down?

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Hmm, it’s not that easy for him to just quit? I managed to quit smoking while I was pregnant and it wasn’t an easy journey. (Everyone is different! I know people who say quit and just quit in a snap.) It also doesn’t help that when I first went for check up at KKH, the gynae was extremely judgemental and simply told me off for not quitting. I believe all smokers know that smoking is unhealthy but it is more of a habit than an addiction! So making the person feel bad about smoking will only push the person further away from what you want to achieve. Maybe your husband is feeling stressed? Really need to understand why he doesn’t stop and continue to do what he’s doing. Hope everything will turn out fine in the end mama! Hang in there!

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1y ago

Yes I totally get that! But when the person is not feeling great, I think being nagged at will not get the person to cooperate. Anyway, hopefully all is well!

Ur husband have to cut down. not only 2nd smoke there is also 3rd hand smoke too. it will stay on on the cloth and furniture. it call SIDS read more about the baby care and share them with Ur family. we all play apart thing can turn out to be bad. we don't see it not doesn't means nothing is going wrong. Secondhand smoke causes numerous health problems in infants and children, including more frequent and severe asthma attacks, respiratory infections, ear infections, and sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). Smoking during pregnancy results in more than 1,000 infant deaths annually.

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VIP Member

I used to smoke a few years ago. Regularly. And I quit because of this one line that someone told me. A visit to the cancer centre shows more wives of husbands who smoke. So why do they have smoke related cancers when they don't even smoke? Because of carcinogens. These chemicals released after smoking will cause to linger on walls, furniture despite having been cleaned thoroughly. I urge you to show him these facts. Maybe he can stop, knowing these effects affect his love ones more in the long run.

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my both in-law smoke too. but only recently I been ask if they already wash their hand, is BC I'm worry for my lo. I can really smell the cigarette smell come from them. and them don't bother the just play and carry my lo. at least change Thier clothes if the wants to play with her. frankly speaking, I use to be a smoker too. but I quit even seen I knew I'm pregnant. I know it troublesome for y'all. so just don't smoke!! is all about my lo health.

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Super Mum

Cigarette packs already have all the images of the effects of smoking. MOH and NEA already publish so many information on the detriment of smoking plus restrictions on smokers. It doesn’t matter much if your house is smoke free zone cause second hand smoke from his clothes and breath is bad enough. If he still don’t get it, I don’t think he would listen to you any further? Maybe when baby is born and hates his smoke smell then he will change.

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VIP Member

Its impossible NOT to understand because we have been educated since young that smoking causes health issues. He picked up the habit regardless of the risk for his own personal choice and thats okay. However, if he choose to compromise other people's health with his own decision thats really dangerous and selfish. I will consider leaving 😅

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!!! I've been trying to tell my IN LAWS smoking is bad for my baby. but yknow what my FIL say, the most ridiculous sentence I've heard in my 23yrs. - "I've been smoking for so many years, im still here kicking and we'll at 67yrs old. I'm sure if baby smells 2nd hand smoke is fine." quoted by my FIL :) I'm speechless ladies.

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3y ago

And ignorant

Super Mum

You can try and show him this article https://www.webmd.com/baby/smoking-during-pregnancy "If you are regularly exposed to secondhand smoke while pregnant, you will have an increased chance of having a stillbirth, a low birthweight baby, a baby with birth defects, and other complications of pregnancy."

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VIP Member

Smoking and second hand smoke increases the risk of stillbirth and birth defects. Maybe get him to join this app and he can learn more about the whole pregnancy journey and fetal development. I learnt so much since I joined