Whenever we visit my Husband's parents. My mom in law always took control of my son. She feed him, napping, etc. It seems like i don't have permission to touch my own son. I know she might missed her grandson but i feel powerless. What should i do?
I feel you! Mother-in-laws in general are very dominant and you really need to know how to emphasize your role as a mother without offending her. It was hard for me before because I lived with my in-laws for almost a year and it felt like she controlled everything. But my mom explained to me the benefits and advantages of it. 1.) Since I am a first time mom, I have to learn all the basics from my mother-in-law and I have to accept it. And I am doing this for my baby. (by the way my mom is in Manila and we are living in Iloilo) 2. Take it as something positive. Since I am away from home, I need all the assistance I can get and good thing is that my mother-in-law is always there. She said not to rely on the Yaya too much, it's better if the baby stays with the mother-in-law while my husband and I are away. So Mommy, you are not alone. All of us experience that with our Mother-in-laws, they just want what's best for their grandchildren. You will get the hang of it. And as for us, let's show them that we can do what they can do and we can be the best moms for our kids like them :)Read more
So there's two angles to this: 1. You are blessed that there's someone to take over for a while so that you can get some much needed rest 2. Some parents do not feel secure that their child is managed by someone else. In this case: be it whoever it is. If there's something u are uncomfortable with, just be frank with that person. It can be a little awkward at first but after a little perseverance they will understand. Just tell her that there's a eg. Feedings can only be done by you. Or during a certain time you will need your baby back to have some bonding time as a routine. As long as the grandparents are not ones who will spoil the child it should be too bad. If they do. Then you must set the rules if not they grandparents will always be the good people and you are the bad people. HahaRead more
Don't worry just chill! She loves him thats why she is doing things like this. Don't feel powerless instead feel relax that your son has such a loving grandparents. A child's child is always dearest nearest the most to the heart of grandparents. At home you are the one who looks after the child then for few hours or days let them take control and love their grandchild because they deserve it they belong to your son and your son belong to them. Kindly have patience and feel relax at least you will have some relief from chores.Read more
If I were you, I'd relish the short break. Your mother-in-law misses her grandchild and she probably wants to give you a break as well. Don't take it as a negative thing -- rejoice that you have a few moments to breathe and know that your child is in good, loving arms. Plus, it's not every day you visit your in-laws right? Let your son's grandmother spoil and dote over her grandson for a short while while you chill and relax :)Read more
I was also like you initially :) I live overseas and my mil comes around like every few months and stays for like 6-8 weeks. It used to annoy the crap out of me. But I've grown to be quite fond of her being like that. It seriously gives me a break from my Son, as I work part time and my Husband is working away 2-3 weeks at a time. Enjoy the time, let her look after your baby and go enjoy with your Husband! :)Read more
U count urself lucky... My inlaw wanna touch my kids my kids dun even let. Hahahs.. As my sis friend mil lagi worse... She stay w her mil... The mil dun even allow her to touch the bb gal... Her mil can even lock the dotter up.. Tgt in the rm and dun allow ppl to go in... Haha.. Sometime my sis friend say.. I can few day nv see my gal... Hahah....Read more
Powerless??? Why how?? Girlie...ain't you lucky you have earned yourself a holiday with your mum in law taking care of your son? :) Look at it in a positive way... You get to put your feet up and chill...You so deserve this..Infact this is a blessing for you... You anyways have your son when he's back with you!! Got it??Read more
if it is few times a week..let her do it lah. they dont see the kids often, close both eyes & ears. my in laws also do things i dont like but u think ah...they only see my kids once a week for few hrs. they will just pamper them. if today u r in their position and yr daughter in law stop u....u also wont be happy rightRead more
I know it's tough, but I'd take the welcome break. Let her spoil (within reason!) Baby for a time - at the end of the day you know she'll be leaving so you can then go back to how things usually are. At the end of the day, they raised your husband so they must've done something OK ;) Go to a spa and have some Me Time!Read more
I would go and take a rest or do my own stuffs! Throw to her! anw, it's the only day she see the grandchild. Intervene only when she can't seems to handle but nt immediately. Usu I would wait for abt 30mins -1hr before I go and take over if the baby keeps whining and crying.