Thoughts on abortion

Hello, It's been a week since I found out I was pregnant and confirmed in the polyclinic I went. An estimated prediction of pregnancy was 7 weeks. I had talks with the father of the child, he was actually happy about the whole pregnancy (he haven't think about the future yet, but was just happy that he could be a father). After a few days and confirmation of pregnancy, we had a talk about our future and also a referral to KKH for scans. I told him that if he did not want the baby, we should go ahead for abortion and not waste more money on scanning and all - which he did think and he also was given a few days to 'calculate' and think about our future. I was actually heading towards abortion because it was too sudden and we are not that ready both financially and because of our families (my family doesn't like him a lot and his mother don't like me at all) But because he was so happy earlier on when I broke the news, I was very invested in trying to ensure I take good care of my body for the pregnancy and maybe my thoughts changed for abortion. When he came back to me upon going through all the reflections and thinking, he told me maybe abortion would be a better choice for our situation. I was half happy because it was something I wanted but at the same time I cried alot at the choice he had also decided, it was maybe because I was so invested in this whole pregnancy I wanted to keep the baby - even though I am worried about the future. Please advice if it would be better to go for abortion instead of giving birth in this situation because I am torn on this.

28 Replies
Write a reply

I will never ever support abortion unless it's because of health issues. Sorry! And I personally think this is not the right place to ask for advices for sensitive issue like this. You really have no idea about the guilt and regret after that. I have friends who even went through depression after abortion and having a hard time conceiving! Oh, and have you watch videos of abortion? You really should you know. The pain your innocent poor baby has to go through. Crushed, sucked and disposed off. And most probably, forgotten after that. A lot of couples are waiting to be blessed with a lil miracle but you, you chose abortion instead just because of lame, stupid reasons like financial issues 😑, family not liking each other and what not. You could have work it out with asking for financial help, work OT, do online sales just to earn the extra cash for your baby. Trust me it's totally worth it to work hard for your child! Do sit down, just alone and think. Think and re-think again. Is this the right decision? The baby is ½ you and your beloved. You both can try to work it out to win your parents hearts. Otherwise, pls do choose adoption. Give your baby a life. A better life. There are many eager couples who will willingly and are happy to adopt your innocent baby. Abortion is NOT the easy answer to your problems.

Read more
VIP Member

Personally I'm never in favour of abortion. The child is not at fault. Not saying you are at fault either. Everyone have their reasons. But here you need to think whether those reasons are bigger than the life of a child. From your post your main constrain is financial dependency. That can change anytime. Today you abort a baby and tmrw you win a toto or find a better paying job or got huge cut bonus, you will be better off financially but you lost the baby already. Again about your families' feeling about you and your spouse, that's all secondary. Important is how do you feel about eachother. You also mentioned you are feeling emotionally attached to the baby already. The guilt may stay there for long. Is it all really worth it is something you need to think. There are many gov schemes to help financially back families. You can also go as a subsidized patient rather than getting a private gynec. During the 40 weeks Pregnancy journey you and your partner will definitely connect emotionally with the baby. If after birth you still feel like you don't want to keep the baby, you can put the child for adoption and help a child less family. Look for reasons to keep the baby and you will find plenty rather than looking for reasons to get rid of.

Read more

Hi there i was in a pretty similar situation 2years back n I ended up being forced to go through the abortion at 23weeks, I was still pretty young back then. Afterwards I fell into depression n everything spiralled downhill, I tried to take my own life more than thrice, drank my nights away but nothing seemed to help n it was until I met my husband then things slowly starting getting better for me, I got pregnant again n we kept the baby, now I have a 9month old n I honestly couldn’t be happier. We aren’t well-off n do struggle financially sometimes, our parents r willing to help alittle for the sake of the baby. My point is, think throughly because money issue can be resolved, there are many grants u can try applying for. I would’ve been better off being a single mother back then n struggle financially than to have went through all of that. However, if u do decide to abort, u will need support, considering the fact that u were so invested in this whole thing, there are gonna be days where it’ll get lonely, but someday soon it’ll all get better.

Read more

Keep the baby my dear, it’s a life inside of you, accidental or not expected or unexpected, it’s a mistake you’ve made and it’s not the poor baby’s fault, I believe when u went for the scan, u see that little figure inside, that’s why u mentioned you were half happy when ur partner decided on abortion . I was ever in your position and did ever thought of abortion but baby is no mistake, a gift from God. I end up keeping her and will be giving birth next month. First time mommy and I’m not financially stable I admit but what I know is I will give the best life that I can for her because I chose this path. As for the father of the child he is not financially supporting me and we have some breakdown. So I will holding this on my own. I don’t know if I can but like I said I will give my best. There’s a lot of Organization out there to lighten your burden. So don’t worry. Think over again before aborting okay? If u need anyone to talk to I’ll be Glad to lend a listening ear.

Read more
10mo ago

Hi, yes I will be going for subsidised rates. However, the father of the child has decided abortion and wouldn't think twice even after I tried convincing multiple times to give birth as I was also scared of the abortion procedure. I was like since both is going to be scary, I rather give birth than lose the baby.. I have been super depressed over the fact that we have to go that route, he did mention it hurts him a lot to have to go through the abortion route and said he doesn't have a choice. I don't know how to convince him other wise.

The both of you should have known better that sex = pregnancy. pls take precaution if you are not ready to be a parent. it's a living baby with a heartbeats. You don't know how much those little beating heart mean to couples who yearn for a child don't you? Only now then you are suddenly bringing up about both parent's disapprovement? if that was a real concern, you shouldn't have stayed together. Work it out like a responsible adult. Internet is not the right place to ask for opinion to kill or keep your child, just like you don't ask for public opinion whether to have sex or not. pls spare a thought for the growing baby and not delay more time if you gonna end its life. if you decided to go for an abortion, pls take this very important advice, in the future, pls use protection or keep your legs close up! I may be too harsh with my words but that's the best advice I could give you. Good luck!

Read more

You will never know if your baby is a blessing in disguise. Both of your parents may not like one of you but you will never know if the baby can soften their hearts. Money can be resolve. There are part time jobs like grab delivery etc for you to earn extra cash. Baby bonus will help with your financial in the mean time. I heard there will also be one-off $3k Baby Support Grant for those baby born in 1st Oct 2020 to 30th Sept 2022 due to the pandemic. Please do not abort if it is not regarding health issue. You should really think thoroughly. Poor baby.. Side story, my sister has been married for 10 years and they still hoping for a baby. I had a miscarriage on the 8th week last year Nov and the heart still ache thinking about it. You are blessed and I hope you will keep the baby♥️

Read more

Personally and there should be more people who don’t agree to abortion. Whatever may be the reason, baby are innocents, and how many couples out there are praying and wishing for a baby but yet they’re still waiting for the miracles to happen because im waiting for my miracles too. But, there’re people out there who just treat the baby as a “toy” which if they doesnt want their baby then they just let their babies go or go for abortion. There is always a way out. think wisely, like what others say, don’t regret in the the future. i sincerely hope you’ll think hard! And i feel if he really love you, he would have plan it out together with you and not agree to ask you to go for abortion too. Jiayou!!

Read more

Babe pls don’t..even the father of the baby doesn’t want it..u keep it..A man won’t agree for abortion..he will have to be responsible of what he did..needs to hands to clap mah if not this won’t happen ryte? It’s ok if he doesn’t wants to be with u if he knows that u want to keep the baby..the baby is not in the wrong babe..poor baby..I know u are strong to go through and raise the baby yourself and there is lot of single mummies that are successful raising their kids on their own..yeah maybe u will have to go through lots of obstacles in the journey of pregnancy..but after that, ur baby will give u a wonderful and blissful life babe..once again, pls don’t terminate it..

Read more

My dear even if he wants abortion.. the decision is up to you. I have aborted before when i was young.. and it haunts me until today. I cried myself to sleep sometimes, thinking about babies I have chose to abandoned. I had struggle getting pregnant years after, not sure if its because of the abortion but I had to go through IVF. I am currently 32weeks pregnant now and no matter how happy I am.. I still remember the babies I’ve had before.. and I missed them dearly. Choose what is best for you. But trust me that you will never be the same person anymore. If you choose to abort.. don’t make the same mistakes that I did, leave that guy. You deserve better. All the best.

Read more

Please don't abort. You are taking away one's life. You may regret for life if you terminate. There must be a reason the baby choose both of you as his/her parents, so please accept. There are many couples want to conceive but unable to, so please think thrice. As long as the baby's father is a good and right man for you, you may ignore his mother or your family likings. They will change when time to come. Financial wise, don't worry too much. Just provide whatever both of you can afford and spend wisely. Don't compare with others. 船到桥头自然直. 🌈💪

Read more
10mo ago

Whatever issues and choices made in the past that had distant your aunt and you, I believe she still dote you as she took care of you since you were young. Perhaps have an outing and dinner with her during this festive season, and let her know your situation. She may be disappointed and feel painful but she will definitely support you. Meanwhile, be careful on your diet, take folic acid and fish oil. Don't worry too much. You should be happy and enjoy your pregnancy. Remember no matter how bad the situation may be, it will soon be over and awaits us are scintillating days. 💪🌈🍀