Hi my 2 elder kids love the iPad. They have learrnt alot through Youtube videos and educational apps. It has also been a helpful tool during some awful tantrums. However, I struggle with using it too often too just like you. I think it's all a matter of moderation. I let them use the iPad after they have finish all their important stuff such as bath, dinner, homework etc. And I limit it to about half an hour. I think with younger kids you might want to let her use it for a shorter duration. Important to let them rest their eyes too after watching to prevent myopia.
For me I would try to delay introducing gadgets as late as possible. My no.1 exposed to youtube videoa at 4 years old and she didn't get addicted. For no.2 since there is sister's influence, occasionally he will ask for nursery rhymes videos. We only use it as emergency solution e.g. in car whining because of long journey. Since i am a sahm, I try to interact and play with them as much as possible and they love it.
We had the same sentiments as you, Wendy. My girl happily helps herself to the hp and look for a fave shows to watch, flashing us that knowing grin. We don't like the idea of her getting hooked so it's about limiting screen time, esp meal times. It's our last resort when we're out dining and she's fussing and crying... only Barney can work his magic! :(
My friend actually let her son use the iPad for extended periods of time and she now regrets it as her son has to wear glasses at the age of 5. On the flip side, she did notice that her son picked up a lot of vocabulary from the applications. It is still ideal to interact with your child instead of letting the gadgets do the babysitting.
Ah Wendy, we all have the same problems! I struggle with it too...I also think as they get older and become more independent and can play on their own, the gadget time becomes less. But I have been guilty of using it once too often to stop a tantrum in the making when we are outside the home....
thanks