10 Replies

This must be because he thinks you to be a villain in his life, as you are the person with whom he has to share his mother's love. Plus, he hasn't seen you during all these years and you are a new person living with them and who takes the attention of his mother. I think you need to develop a bond with him. You first of all need to show him that you are taking his mother away from him and that his mother still loves him the most. Make sure you do not expressive about your love for his mother in front of him. Give him time to accept you. You can make him like you by planning to do activities with him. As a family go for a holiday, picnics, outings, fishing, skiing etc. Do these activities more often, it will develop your bonding with him. http://www.helpguide.org/articles/family-divorce/step-parenting-blended-families.htm

I don't think scolding doesn't help when a kid answers back, be it your biological kid or a step kid. You have to be patient and wait for the right moment to tell the kid that he was wrong. Now that you are new to his family structure, you need to give him time. Let him accept you as a well-wisher, a friend and a father, and things will fall in place. Do not rush into things, as it can dent your relationship with him for life. You can go out for outings with him, to see matches or all boys' thing and this will help you bond with him.

I will suggest you have a casual talk with your kid and ask why she responds that manner. Some kids may think it is fine to do so because their peers are doing it. Parents may need to do necessary correction if there is a need to, help the kid understand why it is no nice to do so.

Here are a few alternatives to scolding: http://sg.theasianparent.com/6-creative-ways-for-disciplining-your-child/ Perhaps he doesn't acknowledge you as an authority figure yet and scolding isn't the best way to get to him or to establish a good father-son relationship

Firstly you can try a different approach such as talking and explaining. You can be firm in correcting instead of scolding, Secondly please speak with your wife. The both of you need to come to an agreement on the method of correcting.

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I think you have to establish your identity and let him know that you care for him first. With good foundation then discipline can work. Could also be a rebellious age depending on how old is he currently.

If it was me i wouldn't scold. I'll prolly say it in a nice way or tell your wife and let her deal with it.

you shouldn't scold at a kid. your wife is right

thanks