I am part of a mummy group on WA. And all the mummy do all day is talk about what new things they have bought or signed up their kids for. They talk about buying 2-3 breast pumps, high tea at various hotels, the best tula carriers to buy, sending their kids for swimming etc. I really feel my heart pain when I see what they can offer their kids and what I cannot. Any other mummy feel this way also?

There are many points to note in your comment. 1. What was mentioned were all material possessions. Are those the only things one can offer the kids? There are lots of immaterial stuff that kids will adore. 2. Financial management. What makes you think that everyone is offering the full suite of items without paying through their noses. Everyone only shows their expense accounts, but no one ever declares their income level nor bank balances. It is important to spend within your means and think of what you can offer your child within your budget. It's only with financial independence can you not be a burden to your child in future. 3. What one offers to the child is not equivalent to what a child needs. No child will say that they wish to have the best tula carrier, best swimming coach, etc. All they need is an immense dose of love and tender loving care from their parents. The enrichment lessons are good exposure but it's not necessary to be able to afford them all. Don't beat yourself too hard on it Mummy. Perhaps you can focus instead on what you can offer your child. Jia you!

Seems similar to one that I've joined previously, was looking for mummies with children born in the same month for playdates and sharing info etc - but what they mostly talked about were jujube products, birthday parties (was around the time our LOs turned 1 so a lot of sharing for dessert tables, expensive parties etc was happening) and how they're going places with their families etc. It got toxic to me because I'm younger than most of them and these aren't things I care about/can afford - as a result, sometimes there would be conflict too so I found myself being happier after quitting the group. The same for friends who live more "luxuriously" (whether they are parents or not), I just found it easier for me to limit my contact with them! But don't get me wrong - I'm happy for them but it's just not the kind of life I'm interested in, so I left notes to explain why I'm leaving the group before I actually do :)

I do selective reading and only read those important information. I am a SAHM too where husband is the only main breadwinner; we led a simple life not because we can't afford, but we want to teach our children that our life can be very fulfilling without spending much money. My girl does not have lot of toys, and she is using all the hand me down clothes from her Cousin unlike her classmates. But I make sure she feel enough by handmade everything for her. Like bunny ear hair clips for Easter celebration, customise homemade cake and goodies bags for her school celebration etc. I don't care about how other live their life and seldom mix around for the sake of mixing around. I only care about empowering my girls that she does not need all the things that other is having to feel empowered. She is empowered because of what she believes in herself.

I also can't afford I'm a SAHM n only my hubby bring home income. We can't sent them for enrichment and activities that they like. Once a while can just buy them toys when there is sales. But compare to myself I tell them that they are so lucky cause I'm from a broken family and all stuffs I have was given by people that they dun wan. How to compare? But I feel that my 3 kids are luckier than those who have lots of classes to attend. They really have a fun n unforgettable childhood. Sure I also feel heart pain like u but I actually explain to them if they wan to be like their friends then they will not be able to spend more time with mummy. U will be surprised my kids actually wan me more than good stuffs.

Hello!! Nothing to feel inferior of! I'm also in multiple mummies WA group.. u don't have to have what other mummies have.. don follow the trend, some are really useless and a waste of $... end up when the trend dies off, u see people selling away all those extras they have at a lost...I also cant afford, so I will just get wat I feel is really needed and useful, if it's too expensive, I will search for good conditions pre-loved..and some WA groups do have very nice mummies who will share good deals and affordable classes and u get to know items on discounts like diapers, milk powders etc etc.. just mixed around with those whom u can click with... I exited 2 chat groups before 😅

I'm in a few grps. I would say not that I can't afford Tula/jjb/llr but seriously I'm not interested in them. So whenever the grps start talking abt them I'll just skip.... I'm not someone who is so interested in those material things, I prefer to spend my money on my boy... to bring him out to play, for class etc which I feel is a better investment ( though it cannot be seen via first impression) so I'll get very alert when they share abt sales/foc classes/play dates etc Only when they talk abt things that interest me then I participate if not I'll just skip... we are already busy as SAHM, no time to waste on such trivial matters...

Please do not be affected by how competitive some parents are. Doesn't mean that you cannot afford the best most expensive things or classes for your child, it makes you a bad parent. Alot of us receive conflicting messages about whether or not to prioritize academics and other accomplishments or, instead, give our children free time, freedom, and free range to explore their environment. Always remember that the best you can do for your child is to give them unconditional love which most of us fail to do. Maybe the best you can do is to leave the group and find another that is able to bring out the positivity in you. ☺

Dont be stress over this. Every parents is different but definitely will give the best they can afford all in different ways. It doesnt mean that only monetary stuff will make u love ur lo more. Its TLC u give every single moment that's priceless. I'm in those groups too but i choose to ignore and do selective reading. I don't deny i envy them sometimes but come to think of it..these r just some fashion statements or their lifestyle even before they give birth. We dont change and live our life for them but for ourselves and loved ones. U can leave the chat if u feel uncomfortable and not meeting them often..it's perfectly fine.

Block them! hahaha... just kidding :-) Like kids, mums are different. It's nice that they have multiple breastpumps and enjoy high teas but I think what matters most is how much your kids adore you. At the end of the day, it's their smile, laughter and the feeling that your kids are content with the love and care you give them that is the most important thing in the world. If you feel uncomfortable, perhaps you should think about joining other groups that have the same interests as you. Don't feel pain. Hugs!! :-)

I’m also part of a mummy group on WA. if you think it’s not relevant to you anymore & you don’t gain friends, better for you to just exit. For me i love being in a group, sometimes if i need some suggestions, tips, feeling down, etc i have my mummy group to support me 24/7! 😍 especially during midnight some mummies still awake. Don’t really need to follow the trend if can’t afford. There are other cheaper options. can also DIY. 😊