I feel like I'm a bad father. My wife gave birth four months ago and I now dread coming home to a screaming baby and a tired wife. Other fathers keep telling me about how they instantly connected with their kid, but that didn't happen to me. We have some good days but they're few and far between. I don't know what to do :(

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Although men aren't the ones who bear children, we are still susceptible to this thing called Paternal Postnatal Depression. Yes, this do exist and most likely, just like in women, it happens to first-time dads. Intervention for this is just the same as women's. It's best to seek advice as early as possible. I suggest you don't vent it to your wife first, unless she can completely understand everything. But having underwent such complex process—from pregnancy to giving birth—she may be more susceptible to depression than you. Taking care of a baby right after the entire tiring process is no joke so if you want to share with her, make sure she is in a healthy disposition. You don't want to be misconstrued.

Magbasa pa

Dude its just normal being a first timer dad like you . I was like that before when we had our first child . Its just a matter of adjustments , just prolong your patience and avoid stress. Let your child be your inspiration to be happy in life not be the cause of your stress. Also show your wife your loving care when you see her tired do the other chores , you should be there strength and they want to see you as a strong dad . I know you can still cope with it soon just think positive everything will be okay :)

Magbasa pa

The connection will come, just be there for your wife and child. Be your wife's support system. A happy wife is a happy life. That happened to me too at first. Now, I can't wait to come home to my family.

VIP Member

cheer ups! Then be the best husband and dad that you can. Every dad is different and I'm proud that you do care about your fatherhood. Not like those cunts who left their wife and childs for their own lusts

set your time after work as your family time. make them feel na after work sa kanila lang talaga yung time na yun. and let them know that you exist.