Dealing with in law!

How to you all deal with in law whom likes to interfere much? When I have arrange photoshoot for my LO during his 1 year old. But I get such negative comment from my mil saying I waste money and it is not necessary. I told her it is just memories for my LO as I regretted not taking it during new born time. Yet she kept saying not necessary, I already gave up replying to her. I have even speak to my husband to tell her not to interfere what am I doing. Yet again, everything I does she likes to interfere and comment unnecessary things! I cannot stand staying with her

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I have a MIL who likes to nag/interfere with each & every little things I do too. Eg: No eating of ice cream, fried & baked items when I am breast feeding! Why I open the curtain when baby is sleeping? Why I buy romper for baby? Why baby clothings so small? The list goes on.... I was so affected by her that I got into depression. After hearing from other mommies, I learn to just 'knod, say ok & walk away'. No point explaining or talking to the elderly as they will never change & they will think that they are right most of the time.

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2y ago

Exactly feeling the same way. I love buying things for my son, and there goes the nag!

If u r not staying with her then I don't see a need to update her anything u do or baby stuff. If u r staying with her no choice. Accept it. You can speak to your husband it won't helps. Only temporary. Mil is like tat wan. I use to stay my in law. Really cannot stand I move out to my parents place. Till I get my own house. I told my husband there is no way I can stay with them. We will always be quarrelling. No point. Try to take a breath outside. It is marriage. But there r some in law very good. They don't interfere. Seldom. Take care..

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2y ago

Yah! Some in law They will support at the back and let you do what ever you want. Not sure is it generation gap hahaha

It’s quite normal that pil will disagree with the things that you do. I usually will act blur and leave the argument/disagreement to my hubby to deal with. From looking at the situation, I think she feels jealous that the photoshoot is done without her in the picture. If you argue with her, she will definitely complain about you to my hubby and your hubby will feel very stressed to be sandwiched between the both of you. So leave it to your hubby to handle and explain to her. I’m sure he will have his way of pacifying her ;)

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2y ago

Best is, my hubby have told her many times. Yet still still behaving the same way. Really want to ignore her. But she will give a face saying “I am talking to you”!

i would continue doing it because its my bond and my time with MY family too. She gets to determine what to with her family when she newly became a mom so this is your turn and she has to respect that i would nicely tell her... that this is what you want and you will be doing it at the end of the day... it is her grandchild wouldnt she like to see nice photographed pics of her grandchild around the house? if she continues, let her continue, ignore it and continue what you want to do.

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Theres no easy way out unless start getting assertive with her. She dont need to know all the details. This is your child your family your life. She still a 3rd person to be giving irrelevant comments. Maybe just give her back dose of her own medicine.. E.g if she says smthg is not necessary u can jus voice out n say no one asked for your opinion? Maybe abit on the assertive side?

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2y ago

Hahahah! I wish I could. Then my hub will come after me.

VIP Member

Not all woman get understanding MIL but they r also a MOTHER TO US but I know at times their control in UNBEARABLE..... Leave her alone n main is ur hubby if ur hubby is by ur side then should be no issues... Like take the photoshot but dun tell her once done tell her sorri aunty ur son is the 1 who wants tis not me

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Bad mother-in-laws are very toxic and difficult to handle. I say there are only three options.. 1. Accept what ever it is. 2. Leave and go. 3. Try to avoid situation or being with in law. If you stay in same home, having less communication may be the better option. All the best.

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VIP Member

Best is ignore. In laws always comments alot. Even a simple thing also wants to interfere/comment. Just do it n go with your instinct / follow your heart. Most of things I never mention to in laws or to anyone. No need to explain either. I just do it. & I’m happy. (:

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I wouldn’t even tell her I got photoshoot for my LO. It’s my baby, not hers. It’s my money, not hers. I don’t need to get her permission. She got no right to interfere. She can comment on whatever she wants, I do what I want.

Super Mum

My favourite way of dealing with such things is... (if it ever did happen) “Thank you Mum for your opinion:)” Then... I carry on doing what I planned 😆 And in this case, she’ll be the first one I show the photo to, and I’ll watch her gush over it.

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2y ago

Hahahah! Nice one maybe I should try