70 Replies
this irritation will soon reflect on how u speak to ur husband abt the kind of lifestyle u r living in comparison to ur friends lifestyle. slowly there will be an entry of dissatisfaction, self pity, victimized feeling and all things depressing... pls shift your focus on what you have as compared to what u don't.... money is something that we can earn anytime...if u have the skills, hard work and a strong family support. but the quality time, the values and beliefs u will instill are priceless. the way economic conditions are, money is a necessity but saving money is the only option. your friend today can afford a lot but times can change in an instant...if not time then people change esp when there's no money. today she gives branded clothes and expensive vacations but for how long...there's a need for values in the kids also..as they will always demand what they grew up with...for her the biggest struggle would be to keep that pricey hi status 'look' always around her and in everything she owns. she must be completely stressed bcoz of that... u live frugally but think about what u r giving to ur kids and husband. your kids are learning how sweet the fruits of hard work are, and how important it is to keep goals, to educate themselves and to find enjoyable careers which will give them a sense of personal achievement instead of blowing off their fathers/grandfather's savings. your husband feels proud of u bcoz he can clearly see the satisfaction u derive in living a life he can afford give. a man thrives on respect more...than love... if he senses your dissatisfaction over your wise frugal lifestyle, it will affect firstly his pride for you. he will sense that and will work more hard to fit into the mould u created in ur mind for him. tht will mean less time he has for u and kids and introduction to lifestyle diseases. is it worth it? hence count your blessings daily...if u have a roof, meals, clothes, ability to work, education and most of all... love..you are richer than your friend... if
Don’t feel jealous even though I know it’s hard and jealousy is a human nature reaction when you keep seeing your friend being able to buy lots of branded items and goes for exotic holidays. Remember always that everyone is different, we have our own ways and methods to survive end of the day. Nothing to compare actually and I believe most or less many of us have such friends or relatives who can always afford a better living standard but still it’s nothing, when their good days are over, they have nothing too. Isn’t that more sad by then? They used to enjoy great quality of life and suddenly everything topple down and make them poor? It’s better than you are frugal and save more for rainy days than those who spend endlessly & mindlessly on branded items etc. We are here to enjoy our lives happily not buying having lots of great items in life, we can also live happily and properly through meagre means. And if you are willing to hard enough, I believe you can enjoy better life quality too. Life’s tough enough, so why worry more for such thing? You’re making your own life miserable and hard by comparing all the time. I rather spend my time thinking about how I can earn more and raise better kids. Think again. Nothing else matters than your health comparing and competing with someone who doesn’t worth this. Thanks!
Don't ever "judge" a person's life by what you see, even on social media! Of course, there's nothing wrong to be living like that - but it's not something that everyone needs/want. Also, not everything you see online is true - someone looking "happy and rich" on social media may be feeling lonely inside because all the time their partner has is spent on earning the money used on that bag, and there are also people who work and save for months to get something for themselves too :) Yes, the brand may be nice to look at - but it's no different from any other bag other than its price! All bags are used to store your belongings, whether it's a Prada or a pasarmalam bag. If your friend is well off, be happy for her - but don't put yourself down because of what she has! You may not be rich, but you have a husband helping to do his best - you may not be able to splurge on everything but you can better appreciate the little things in life that doesn't come as often (eg. a fast food meal or movie can be a treat!). I guess what I'm trying to say is, just focus on your own life - it doesn't matter what anyone else is doing! Doesn't matter what you do for a living, how much you earn, where you live or what bags you use - at the end of the day, you just need to be happy for yourself :)
It's normal to feel jealous and sad over such material things in this day and age but is it really worth the heart ache? Those things are temporary and having them does not necessarily mean that you will be happy or that your life is complete. Has it ever occured to you that maybe she has all those things because she has no other commitments or that she might be trying to fill a gap in her life? Your husband is working hard to give you a comfortable albeit simple life and I think that is something to ponder on. Also, correct me if I'm wrong but are you working? If you are not and you wish to own some of those material goods, maybe you can try earning some money so you can have the financial independence? Don't look and covet what others have -- look into your life and reflect on all the good things you already have. The grass is always green on the other side. For all you know, your fancy friend is craving some simplicity and a doting husband the same way you are wishing for her branded goods and exotic holidays.
we never get jealous of the people we truly love. actually we feel happy when we see them happy. so try to make her a TRUE friend for you. get closer. open your hearts to each other. share good moments and nice activities that make you forget about branded life. like cooking for example or any sports or anything you may have in common. try to be close friends. ask her about her fears, or maybe the sad moments she had. and you talk for yourself as well (of course if she is trustworthy). also, if she is a good hearted person, tell her that you wish you can live like her. when you dont hide things in your heart, you feel much better, and you show a strong personality. and finally, happiness is not about the things you have, it is about your attitude in life, how you forget our fears or sadness and laugh,and how much people enjoy spending time with you. if you get money but lose your good relations with people, you lose everything.
Find other way on how you can enjoy your family day. It doesnt need to be expensive or something. I do also have a lot of friends travelling now a days, my sister in law is a branded buyer as well but I dont care what they have or what they are doing, because whats important to me is I have a complete family and we are not starving. If you dont have enough Or extra money for this things then dont aim for it, is about NEEDS OVER WANTS. Its not yet the end of the world, time will come naeexperience mo rin yan. Try going to a picnic instead or mall. Kami ni hubby pumunta kami nang mall with our daughter, we play inside the arcade and my daughter loves playing in a play house tapos kain. We also have a car to use for travelling, but we choose not to travel 😂😂 not for now. I'd rather buy things for our house than spending thousands for something that for me is not a good investment. Probably in the future, but not for now.
See, there's no end to comparison. Today, you are getting jealous of her tomorrow you may have a friend who is richer than her and even if you will have more money there will be no end to your jealousy. Material things are temporary. You never know, she may be going to exotic holidays, but their overall married life is on rocks. And even if they are happy and have lots of money, then also seeping the seed of jealousy would do no good to you, neither financially nor personally as a how you grow as a person. The good thing you can learn by looking at your friend is, you can learn how to manage your finances. Her husband must not be born rich, he must have worked or both of them must have worked to be this financially sound. So, you also become a smart saver. Check how you manage your finances. Make smart investments and save money for holidays as well.
i dont understand why some couple/families would envy others who are well off, not just their friends but family/relatives too..remember that what you see outside is not their real status in life, you might not know, mas mabigat pa problema nila kesa sayo na hindi lang mabigay luho sa pamilya. dont be like that..i have close friends like that, they think i have better finances than them, without even knowing that time that we're struggling coz my father is dying of cancer and all i hear is their rants due to lack of money while my worry is more than money can buy..and so my dad died, thats when they realized they have been too selfish and insensitive. please dont be like that..money wont bring you happiness
it's all about the money and the good life isn't it? I understand it's important but then, it's not the parameter for happiness. please look at other aspects of ur married life such as the relationship you share with your husband and things like that. plan your finances. if u are looking for a big trip then maybe u can cut down on some other expenses. plan ur itinerary so that u know how much it will cost.also look for budget friendly options such as home stays and such..don't get upset.use ur energy to sit and plan with ur husband instead :)
good things do make us feel all is fine, but are you sure your friend is equally happy in her relationship as the amount of things she buys and the number of exotic holidays she goes on? you mentioned your husband earns very frugally. what about you? if you are so interested in an expensive lifestyle, why don't you go out there and earn the money for yourself? maybe then you can take your hubby too on an exotic vacation? more and more women are getting financially independent, and it will make you feel great too!