Sounds like there's a lot of grievances going on. To embark on a marriage, both should have come to an acceptance of behaviors and attitudes. Compromising will one day cause a major disagreements and that's to the fault of both parties. One keeps pushing in wits and the other willingly accepts be it in anger or annoyance.
Knowing there is an anger issue here, one who keeps pushing the other to limits and when the receiver retaliates it causes more unhappiness. Both sides are at play for the outcome of today. It takes two hands to clap. Men and women have pride and ego but be reasonable and not witty.
Identify the problem, sit down and reflect on yourself: what efforts have you made to keep this marriage like the way you envisioned to be, have you swayed from your priorities and duties in the marriage and lastly, what have you done to yourself and spouse to bring and develop the best out of each other. Once you have sorted yourself out, sit the other party down and have a heart to heart talk; just the two of you.
Remember it takes 2 hands to clap. It takes two to make a union and it takes a union to make the marriage last.
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