Feeling down

My baby is 17 days old and in abt 2 weeks time my nanny will be leaving and I will be taking care of my own baby. I don't even know the basics of carrying my baby and just learning now. It doesn't help that my nanny always say if I do this to my baby I will break his arm etc. (She showing me) Ask her to show me how she shower baby she says 我学不到的。I don't have in laws or parents to help too. My husband is helping to take care of baby too but when he goes to work I am all alone. I want to be confident to take care of my baby but it is demoralising. Also baby is now more attached to nanny. When I hear my baby cries my heart feels frustrated.

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VIP Member

DO NOT LET HER WORDS DISCOURAGE YOU! You’re the mother and you’re her employer! On the last week I told her I’m going to bath my baby for 3 alternate days so she stood there and guide me. Before that I just see how she do it! Somehow I managed to do it after she left! I’m a first time mum (27 years old) and I do not have helper or in laws or my own parents to help and teach me with all this! Plus I’m staying alone with husband so I handle all the chores and baby by myself (husband will help once a while) Don’t worry about it! As for now just let the nanny handle her till the last week before she leaves! Usually day time I will look after baby by myself and night time I will just wake up 2 hourly to pump! I’m sure you will be able to do it!! The mother instinct somehow will guide you through!! Let’s jiayou together!!

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Super Mum

You’re right that sometimes, things don’t come naturally, and they require lots of practice. Tell your nanny nicely but firmly that you want to learn. If she refuses to teach you, practise with your husband so you feel less scared. Watch youtube videos. There are some pretty good ones for basic baby care techniques. Watch how your nanny handles baby. If none of that helps, you can try going for parentcraft classes. There are some good ones in Singapore. It’ll help you be a lot more confident:) Your baby is blessed to have a mummy that wants to do her best. Jiayou! P.S. if nothing still works, give me your contact details and I’ll go over to your place to teach you:) We can all do with some help sometimes.

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5y ago

Thanks babe! I will do my best

it was hard for me to be alone with a baby when husband was at work during ML. i told my parents and they took turn to accompany me while husband was at work. as i became more confident, i told them to come later or go home earlier so that i experienced alone time with baby for a while before husband was home. time passed quickly this way and i felt happier. if your parents cannot help, how about asking other friends or relatives? can also check with close neighbours.

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VIP Member

I'm not sure why your nanny is so negative? I will suggest for you to be firm to her and insist that you want to learn. I told my nanny that in the third week and she guided me step by step. Now I'm doing almost of the baby's caregiving. Dont worry about being overwhelmed. I also felt overwhelmed when the nanny left. But you will swiftly pick up the skills when you know no one is there to help you out (happened to me haha). Jiayou mummy!!

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5y ago

Thanks mummy!

Hey mummy! I’d say fire the nanny and handle the baby on your own. You don’t have to know how to do those things. U just know! It’s ur baby we are talking about. U will learn as u handle him/her. Trust me it will only get easier. The more u hands on, the easier it gets. Don’t let somebody “smart” ruin your morale and mind. You are in control. So take it. God bless!

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VIP Member

Aiyoh. I also felt panic when my nanny leaving. However, mother instinct will kick in one. When you are with baby alone, somehow you will be able to manage one. Slowly you will learn your baby pattern and slowly get better in handling her. Don't let her words affect you. You need to be mentally strong for yourself and baby! You can do it! Mummies are fighters! Jiayou!

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VIP Member

Horrible nanny. You HAVE to learn. She is trying to make herself indispensible even though she is not going to stay around for much longer. Feedback her attitude to the agency and make sure you learn as much as you can. Practice practice practice! You can do it mama! Baby WILL forget the nanny. I certainly don't recall my first month of life and I highly doubt anyone will.

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5y ago

I was looking forward to nanny, and also communicated with an open mind but after communicating for sometime, I realised she is always pushing her ideas and do not cater to what we want instead. Spoken to her many times but she does not listen. Only see she took care of baby well so close one eye. Now at her 3rd week, really hope my confinement ends soon so I don't have to 受气 。Ya u are right, babies dun remember anyway 😄

Happened to me too. In the end I just ask the CL and hear what she says, like what to do or not do and why. So no need to argue or quarrel. But I will decide in the end what advice or steps I want to follow or not. Don’t worry, just practise and do ur own way. Even after she’s gone, you can experiment. Babies are hardier and more forgiving than you think.

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5y ago

Thanks mummy!

I had the same experience, but when the nanny is gone, naturally it all comes together well.. tbh, now I think back, confinement nanny really waste money one, mine gave me the same attitude as what you mentioned now. Don't let her words bother you too much, in any doubt just ask all of us here 😊

Hi mummy, I suggest that you change ur nanny... she should not say this kind of stuff to you... nanny is to help you and guide you to take care of your little one... you have to tell her 我就是不懂才请你来教我