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Third hand smoke issue

Anyone here is dealing or dealt with third hand smoke issue coming from own parents? My parents are helping me with my newborn during confinement and also when I’m going back to work. My dad is a heavy smoker and loves to smell my newborn head and kiss his mittens and I am very concerned of the residual smoke on him would stained on my newborn. However it is very difficult to talk to my dad about this as he is a very dominant man and me and my siblings all grew up healthy under this environment - so he might not understand the concern of third hand smoke and may feel offended. So I turned to my mom hoping she could help me to convince my dad to stay away from my newborn until the smoke residual subside, but it is disappointing that she don’t see it a concern as well. Today I use another approach to tell him not to kiss newborn’s mittens because he has the habit of putting it in his mouth and that is quite unhygienic considering there is a virus outbreak now - but my dad didn’t give me any response. Aside from that, my parents always think I am a hygiene and control freak so making me extra difficult to talk and convince them to be aware of third hand smoke. I can say but they can don’t listen. And worse is I still need their help to take care of my baby.... So comes my question....has anyone encounter situation like this whereby your newborn is in contact with third hand smoke all the time but turn out to be fine?

Anonymous

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VIP Member

My dad and brother smokes and I would not let them carry or touch my baby unless they change their clothes or wash hands first. It’s not safe for babies to get into contact with third hand smoke. It’s not good for their skin / throat / lungs as their immune system is not developed yet. They might get upper respiratory infections more often if they inhale smoke or residue get into their mouth but it seems like your parents don’t really care about this. It’s also hard for them to change the habit of kissing your baby’s mittens. More so if they are taking care of your baby after you go back to work. May I suggest you look at infant care facilities or other childcare arrangement? Or consult a doctor / paediatrician on the risks? If they won’t listen to you, perhaps they will listen to a doctor?

Super Mum

My mom is a smoker herself and smoke infront of me. also infront of my nieces and nephews. These kids may turn out fine. I turn out fine. But why must we conform to her way of living? As a parent i want the best, be my daughter's advocator. Choosing the best decision for her. So yep, even when i know i need help, i will die die try my best. I will not settle for less. May seems arrogant but just want the best for my child.

VIP Member

Sigh. I understand how you feel because my in laws are pretty dominant. No matter what I tried to say, they will counter it by saying “ you guys were also raised in this manner” As for me, I showed them articles to “scare” them. They insisted on feeding water to newborn. 😪

Anonymous

Sigh. Did you method work? I tagged my mom in these articles in Facebook but she also didn’t response anything :( gosh the water thing...Don’t know why all the elders love to feed baby water

Super Mum

U may want to tell your dad that the covid virus. Better wash hands before touch baby and smokers more prone to covid virus bcos immunity is lower

VIP Member

tbh its very difficult to convince them.. the only way you have is talk to him until he fully understands your point

Perhaps find a video and show him the effects of 2nd and 3rd hand smoke effects on the bb and family

Super Mum

If u can change the mittens or clothes more often it will be fine

VIP Member

Even there might be babies who grew up fine, dont risk it.

Super Mum

When I bring my baby to hawker , there is second hand smoke also.

Anonymous

But you are not in hawker 24/7 right...my parents are around my newborn almost 24/7.

VIP Member

Talk to your dad nicely to seek his understanding

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