My 2 weeks baby jus got discharged from hospital. My hub just shouted at the baby to shut up when he's crying hysterically just now. I feel so exhausted, depressed and heartbroken. I really dislike his this behaviour. How to change him. I tried talking to him, he seems to still lose his cool when he cannot tolerate the high pitch crying.

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I was on the blink of exhaustion with my new born at the start as well, was scolding the baby for crying until my husband jokingly says, "you are so funny.. Haha.. Why are you angry and arguing with a month's old baby? *as if he understand you, it's so silly". The tense atmosphere immediately becomes so relax, we both have a good laugh over that. And everytime after that when I get angry, I laugh at myself instead. Sometime humour and the truth being told helps..

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VIP Member

Both of you need some help. As in someone to come in and help with whatever you need. E.g. help with household chores and even just to hold or take care of the baby while you shower or nap. E.g. parents, in laws, siblings, friends, confinement nanny, maid can help in different capacities. Tiredness can bring out the worst in people. However, if he is ever physically violent to you or baby, don't just meekly accept it or excuse his behavior.

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Not everyone has patience for continuous crying. I a mom sometimes also lose my cool(but never jialat ask baby to shuddup la), just carry the baby somewhere (maybe just not comfortable at that environment, baby ma.. very sensitive to their surroundings de) then when u agar see he a bit more chill le u bring back. Its never easy for first times de..

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Oh dear, it's not easy to take care of a newborn and it can get really exhausting for the both of you. Is there anyway u can get help, family or hire a nanny so that get can some rest? Try to get professional help for the anger management which may have underlying issues.

TapFluencer

Is there any confinement lady or someone elderly to help you now? Is not easy for u to talk sense to him when your baby is crying. And he has to understand that this will continue for few years. I hope you are coping well

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VIP Member

Maybe your husband is frustrated at work but still this is not a good reason to raise his voice at a baby. Besides talking to him, both of you need some couple time as well so do look into that.

Just ask help from friends or relative, guess he is too tired or feel "bored" and he tend to vent his anger like that.. u must be strong too, i know its not easy, afraid he might do worse 😭

Super Mum

Get hb to cool down first, maybe ask him to go buy something or take a walk. When he is calm liao, talk to him about the unhelpful shouting. U cannot change him, he has to do it himself.

It takes times. If it’s first time dad they might not get used to it. My hub always asked be to bring him else where when he is crying. I feel so heartache as well.