7 Replies
If I were in your shoes, I would sit her down and let her know that I am aware that she is in a relationship. Try to find out the reason why she felt the need to lie and address those concerns. Next, I would stress that as long as her work is not affected (e.g., not spending excessive amount of time on the phone, going out during working hours), she can spend her free time however she likes. Also, I agree with setting boundaries such as not having her boyfriend over in the house, coming back before a certain time on her off day. The most important thing, I feel, would be to find out the underlying reason for lying so that her concerns could be addressed. This will help build trust between you and her. Good luck!
IF your helper has lied, I'd like to question the relationship between you and your helper. If she trusts you and you treat her like your friend, I don't think the issue of "lying" would take place. If I were you, I'd set boundaries for example, she isn't allowed to bring her boyfriend into your house. She still gets the same number of off days like you agreed on. Lastly please DO NOT address your helper as a "maid". It's as if you see her as something less than a human being.
She's probably afraid of losing her job and getting sent back that's why she lied but that still doesn't excuse her from lying. Honestly if this happened to me and I found out, I'd give her a stern warning about not overstepping boundaries because it can and will cost her her job. The moment she oversteps and I catch her doing inappropriate things like sneaking off to see him during work hours or worst still, bring him home when no one is around, I'd terminate her employment.
Well, reason for lying can be many. She might be woried about loaing the job and asked to go back. I would eduxate her to be truthful rather than lying. One lie will lead to another and it is even more stressful having to remember what she had said previously. Explain the pros and cons to hwr about having a boyfriend.
If she is performing her duties well and whether she has bf or not, really not a big deal to me as long as she doesn't bring him home and not getting herself preg. However, if she has off days and her bf is in spore, I will in general share with her about being preg and being hacked to death by bf.
Its ok if she lies and I don't find out. Its also ok if I find out as long as the bf doesn't affect her work and he doesn't enter my house. Just to be extra cautious, I'll get a little more careful and install a camera to check whats happening at home wen I'm away.
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