My inlaws have been constantly commenting on planning a child. Sometimes they bring it up indirectly in front of other relatives also, it has become really frustrating. Me and my husband have talked on this and we want to wait for some time. Moreover, I think this is totally both of our's decision and nobody else's. How should I deal with my inlaws' incessant questioning? Please help!

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Family planning concerns you and your husband alone, since you both are the main foundation in building your own. So do not be bothered by what other people will say, be it your in-laws or even friends in general. Yes, you can hear all of their advices and comments but in the end, it will be all up to you and your husband. What you can do is to explain to them that you understand the excitement of having a baby but you also understand the things you need to prepare--in all aspects--before having one. They should be able to understand you both in time. After all, they're husband&wife turned parents, too.

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Since you and your husband are on the same page, it'll be good to mention this to your in laws. Let them know that you feel uncomfortable indirectly questioning them in front of relatives and hopefully they will understand and give you some space. If they belong to the type that can't get it, you could probably ask your husband to "threaten" them by saying "if you pressurise us some more we may not feel like having kids at all" (in a harmless way). Wish you all the best but the best way to shut them up is to of course have a baby! Hehe.

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It's something many people can relate to and it's normal. But it can also be annoying at some point. The important thing to remember is that this it is ultimately your decision when to start a family. Try treating it with a sense of humor but also be firm in telling them that having a child is something very important and that the timing will entirely be up to the two of you---but be careful not to offend them. They're bound to back off if you lighten up a bit. :)

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I think it would be good to sit down and have a talk with your in laws, both you and your husband. Of course, you will need to speak with your husband so that both of you agree on this and also agree on what to tell the folks. Most in laws do not really understand exactly what you are going through in your life and also what your priorities and reasons are. So explaining this to them (in a nice way) will help them understand your intentions better. All the best!

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I do understand the pressure coming in but at the same time I don't think u shud give into the pressure... This is a normal expected behavior of inlaws. Id be surprised if this wasn't. Try explaining the same to them. If they get it good, if not be strong and continue facing the pressure but do it only wen you want to! Also... may be they too are under societal pressure :)

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I totally understand what you are saying.. this was my case around three years ago.. My husband was with me (actually he would have delayed the baby if he had the choice). We simply talked to my in-laws about it and told them that we arent ready for a baby for at one-two years. Trust me they understood us and didnt get the topic again

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I'm a big fan of candor. I encourage you to have an open and honest conversation as a unit (hubby and wife) with the in-laws about your stance in having children. If they are the adults we should hope they are, they will respect your choice. If not, think of a happy place instead the next time they ask to lessen the aggravation :)

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