ISANG DEKADANG PAGSASAMA PERO AYAW MAG PAKASAL

Lord, how would I know if I am with the right partner? It is almost a decade (10 years) with this person. I am just patiently waiting for him to ask me to get married but the question is for how long? Is this still worth fighting for? Sometimes I cry myself to sleep, thinking that I am not a wife material or a marrying type. Btw, we already have 2 kids, a stable job, a business and some properties. I don't know what is running on my partner's mind. I tried to ask him about his plans several times pero parang wala sa plano nya magpakasal. I felt so pathetic na minsan ako pa nagyayaya sakanya but he refused kasi marami daw gastos, wala pa kaming sariling bahay, lahat na ata ng excuses meron sya. I never asked for a fancy or grand wedding. Sabi ko kahit civil lang at wala ng iimbitahin. Nag agree sya dapat nung September pero nag bago isip nya ewan ko kung bakit. Parang kong naiwan sa ere, wala akong clue, wala akong idea kung bakit. Naiyak na lang ako. Any thoughts po? Anyone here with the same experience?