It’s normal. Mine was a planned pregnancy and it took us more than a year to conceived. I didn’t feel any connection to baby at all even when I was pregnant. Epidural side effects was so bad the moment they put baby on my chest i told them “please take her away and leave me alone”. I was feeling like sh!t with the crazy vomiting and weak all over. Definitely not love at first sight. It took me 2 months to accept the reality and baby. First few weeks I did everything because I feel like “it’s my job and I have to do it even tho I detest it and definitely not willingly.” When I feel better personally (mentally and physically), that’s where I started to interact and open up to my own baby. I started to accept her, feel the joy when I’m with her and then not seeing this as a job but a responsibility willingly. I would say, get all the extra help you have, focus on your wellbeing first. With our body being mentally and physically exhausted, we cannot see things on the bright side. Everyday is just like “this sucks, why did I do this to myself, I could have enjoyed life and so on.” then that’s where we start to feel like sh!t. Give yourself some time, it’s totally normal, you’re just a human being with emotions. People often forget while baby is important, mom’s wellbeing is also equally important. You will overcome this 🙌🏻😊.
a newborn is not going to melt away all the life struggles and suddenly better your mental wellbeing... and prehaps all these comments people give us makes us feel like we should be doing/loving more for our newborn. like these comments raise the expectations so high, but the truth is a not everyone experiences childbirth/parenting the same way. for you to consider this, it means you're trying and want to change something, and that is what matters more than how you "should" feel towards your baby. maybe you werent ready for a baby when you found out you're pregnant? maybe you dont know yet what it's like to be a parent? feeling this way is valid, take your time to connect with baby. not everyone instantly "clicks" with their baby, so dont stress yourself.
When you’re feeling all better physically, you can interact with your baby and that creates bonding Yes, life is totally different now, sometimes I sigh over that too. I tell myself I’m a different person now, but in a good way and I’m getting to know the new side of me which will never be known before becoming a mother. Do things with you baby that you would enjoy, like a walk to the mall, feel connected to the “old world” from the childless days. You’re not a bad mom. You simply need time to adjust.