Maybe you can try being more patient? Patient is a key part of respectful parenting. Every time you feel like punishing your child, take a breath and remember the principles of "respectful" parenting. Respectful parenting is a new concept if you're not used to it. Don't worry about it too much, if you're intentions are good, hopefully all will come into fruition :)
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Guiding kids nowadays are different from the past. Yes, spanking os still required. However, you need to administer both hard and soft approach. Patience is extremely important here.