Stop loving my husband

Ever since baby was born, I was so busy and tired taking care of baby. Husband is around to help, however I still feels that I am doing alot. I had to bath her because daddy dare not bath her. When I change her diapers, he feels that it's not necessary because diaper is not full yet. Baby doesn't like husband to carry her at times, especially when she is cranky. When he carrys her, he won't help with other chores. When my milk supply dropped, he kept asking me to pump more, feed more hoping my supply will increase. I am so tired. I had to ask him to help with housework or else he will sit there and do nothing. Husband & I stop having sex when we found out that I was pregnant. We wanted baby to be safe. Baby is 5months old now & I don't feel like being intimate with him. Is this normal? At times I wonder if I still love him.

Anonymous

5 Replies

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VIP Member

Yes. Postnatal hormones can make people feel crazy. The added load of motherhood can easily make one sink into self pity. But it will get better. Try to think in your husband shoes and spend couple time together when baby is asleep. Get some help from people to care for baby, even if it's a short well. And lower your expectations of how things should be. Take care.

Sorry to say many men have the mentality to be served and take thing for granted. They forgotten they are part of the family and if they say they are tire then aren't their wife not tire? If they say don't know how to do the household chores then can't they learn. Tell him to share your load or simply assign to him. Take care.

1 more comment

Alex

dad

5y ago

Thank you for your compliments. My mother didn't allow me to help in household chores before I married even though she was busy. I learnt to do it myself and help my wife after married. I felt tired at times but was thinking she must be tired too. Moreover, she just like those mummies, did what men couldn't do ie pregnant, and has to suffer definitely more than 10 months (besides 10 months carrying a baby in her womb, control diet, skin problem, backache, legs cramp, delivery pain etc, confinement, breastfeeding in the middle of the night, engorgement etc). Women are great especially pregnant because they are risking their lives as there may be complications. Most of them also help to bring in income for the family as well. Therefore, I always think I should do my part as well. As a man, married with a woman is not only just to have a family, have children and satisfy our urge. Some people even mocked at me for washing my wife's panties/bra and bought sanitary pads, said is unlucky.😅I

Just remember that some men wants to help but they don't have "auto" mode in their brains. Just push the on button and get him to work by schedule else whenever you want to. Don't give up, at least he helps when you asked. Some men, ask him also won't help.

VIP Member

I can sympathise with you as this is how my dad behaves to my mom sometimes. Learning from how they communicate, it is important to let know expectations.

VIP Member

Tell him sleep helps with supply

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