Stressful Tired New Mum (Rant)

Sounds similar to my confinement. My mum keep calling to ask me what confinement lady cooked etc. I got so fed up sometimes and thus didn't pick up her call. She will rant but then I explained to her that I need rest and baby sleeping. After two weeks, we fired the confinement lady and I went back to my mum's house. Reason was because her cooking was horrible. Everyday the same and she use five bottles of sesame oil in two weeks. After few days I saw my blood veins busting everywhere. Then she ate all the good quality foods that my husband and in law bought for me. After that she will told me that they gave me cheap and rotten foods. What a great drama plot I never think will happened to me. We caught her throw away all the meat from pig trotter. I got flow of breast milk at the start and my husband want me to bf too. But because of sick, I took medication twice and MIL asked me don't bf baby because the med will go to baby. Eventhough she did this for the sake of baby, but I really regret now as this has reduced my BM drastically. During the period of medication, I fed baby FM. After recovered from sick, baby refused bf and bm because fm was so tasty to him. So I spent another few days to make him like my bm. Baby constipation and colic after taking fm, so again I have to ran up and down for PD. In my mum's house, i took care of baby alone because my mum busy cooking and taking care of my sis son. my baby ate lot and i have to fed him every hour during day time and every two hour in the midnight. I dont enough sleep and become very moody. my husband will visit me in the weekend and help me take care of baby so that i can sleep. However, he was inexperienced too so I have to do most of the feeding myself. But he played with baby a lot. Huh.. So tired. But everything was fine after two months. I learn a lot how to be a mum and protect my baby..

I have a bad confinement period too. My mil brought my husband's niece and nephews along to my house during the confinement and they made so much noise and trouble that i cant even rest in peace. As she is bz taking care of them so i had to feed, change diaper, pat my own bb to sleep by myself. My mil will only help to shower my bb in the morning and wet wipe in the evening. I also handle night duty all by myself. My own mum also keep calling, nagging me to drink tonic wine, commented that my confinement food is just normal "cai fan", nagged that i shower and wet my hands (as i wash my own dishes and milk bottles etc). I hid and cry daily due to all these, i also have no appetite and lose a lot of weight, not enough sleep. I also have issue with dl and low supply of milk so i supplement with fm. Now the confinement period is over, my mil goes back to her own house, i looked after bb all by myself, i am tired but happi and enjoy the peace. A piece of advise, tell urself all these will be over soon, just bare with it for a month. Infact i kinda regret that i let all these get into me that i did not spend enough quality time looking at my bb and taking picture of him. I barely had any picture of my bb when he is less than a month old.

It’s normal to get hungry when you are breastfeeding. It’s ok to eat a little bit of soya sauce. Ginger is good for you at this stage as it expels wind from your body. Try asking her to make it less spicy? You need to eat more nutritious food during confinement so that your body can recover. You can take a little bit of wine in your food because most of it will evaporate. It’s normal to feel weak and giddy postpartum so you must try to rest as much as you can. Breastfeeding is good but it is a skill. Try engaging a lactation consultation to teach you how to latch and breastfeed your baby. You will not regret it!

Totally understand what you are going through. Hang in there and don't fret the little things. You can't please everyone and you don't have to. Now it's all about you and your baby. Focus on breastfeeding and the baby and be prepared to make compromises if u hv to for the sake of your own mental health. Eg. If not enough breast milk giving formula is not the end of the world. I'm doing mixed feeding using bottle as can't get my LO to latch.

Can your family cook and bring over since they are concern about what you eat? Alternatively just order tingkat to avoid any potential conflicts. Alcohol should be ok if eaten after being cooked. To me is, if the MIL and mother have so much comments to make, then take care of the baby. Help.. if not just stfu

Hey, The first advise would be to not be too hard on yourself and don't worry too much about pleasing everyone. Just focus on your baby and your health and also speak to you husband about all the situation and I am sure you both will come up with a solution to deal with the mIL as well

DON’T please other people. Take care of yourself first then your baby. If you are unwell, not enough rest and food, your supply will be affected too. Tell them to back off although you know they all care for you.

Stay positive . Network with other mummies. My wife joined a support group for moms and it helped her a lot

Do try n relax. Too stress n lack of sleep will affect the milk production. Find someone to talk to.

Can you order food delivery?