Grandma who doesn’t follow any rules

Hey other mums, how do you handle a grandma who basically doesn’t respect your parenting style and breaks all rules that you set up? For example 1. Letting your kid watch tv when she doesn’t usually get any screen time 2. Putting her to bed 2 hours after her usual bed time 3. Eating pancakes and chocolates and other junk that she usually doesn’t eat (though asks for) 4. Buys her dolls and princess toys and pink frilly clothes and calls her princess ( I am trying to raise an independent child who is gender neutral and hopefully likes STEM) My Daughter absolutely adores her grandma, and I know my mum loves my kid a lot too. But how do I get it into my mum that all of these rules in my home I set up are critical to me and whenever she “spoils” my child I end up having a tough time course correcting. Also my mums excuse is it’s fine, normal, she did it for me and I turned out fine. My argument is I turned out fine in spite and not because of all this. Plus the lack of routine, bad diets and bed times really did have a negative impact on me and has been something I have grappled with even as an adult. Pls advice. Am at my wits end and I don’t want to shout at my mum but I also know that speaking nicely doesn’t work.