My mil is the same like your Mom. She acts as a victim in front of other but slap my Husband like nobody business when he did not obey her. Before we are married, she told me she don't like my husband so don't expect her to leave anything for us. When she know my sil is unable to give birth to any kid then she want to be close to my two girls (in the beginning she never even want to be close them as they are not boy). She told my husband she "like" me a lot as I take good care of her grandchildren but told me she hate me because my husband only listen to me nowadays. Long story short, I still let her see my kids twice per month with me around. I will correct my girls right away when my mil do something wrong or treated my husband badly to guide them right, from wrong. It is tired but I feel it is unfair for them not able to enjoy their grandparents' love and I used those bad "moment" as opportunity to guide them.
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