will your baby prefer helper over you?

Hi mommies who leave their lo with helper while going back to work, can you share with me how you actually manage your emotions? I am going back work soon and leaving my helper at home only with lo. Upon thinking of this, i am super sad already. I'm super scared that lo will want helper in future over me. She is turning 3 months next month and the following months are crucial as they start to recognise people. I think i will cry if she wants helper to carry and comfort her and not me. I definitely will try to spend more time with her when i knock off from work and on weekends (my job is 5 work days) but i would like to hear from fellow mommies on how you manage and takecare of lo so your lo will still look for you and not prefer you over helper or nanny. I think i will have separation anxiety when i go back work :( Thanks!

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Super Mum

My helper has been with my baby since 3 months til now (13 months) and naturally, my baby loves the helper! I do feel sad and a bit jealous sometimes, but it is fleeting and I try to tell myself, if baby loves the helper means my helper is doing a great job and keeping my baby happy. When I go home from work, I spend all the time with her and we share a bed at night and I take care of her when she wakes up at night. She knows who her mummy is and I can tell she loves me, even though she spends more awake time with helper. Babies are smart, you should trust your baby and whenever you can, spend time talking to her, playing, reading, telling her how much you love her and give her lots of cuddles. I'm 100% certain there will be no mistaking who her mummy is :)

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VIP Member

I have gone back to work since Oct 2019 and so far, my girl still attaches to me. She is ok with either one of us. She latches to me so I have this advantage over my helper. When I am home, I shower and spend the rest of her waking time playing and doing things that my helper does not do. This way, she can distinguish me from the helper and there are activities she only does with me.

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2y ago

What are the activities you do with lo?

VIP Member

My helper is with my lo since birth till now (4months) as I have to be out in the day, and usually only come home in the evening. Don’t worry, when you’re latching your LO, just let him/her know that you’re the mum. Naturally they will understand! 😊

2y ago

i have same concern and i dont latch too. but the console is every 2 years she is gone and new one come. nothing to jealous as the rship wont last