Need help..

Im a mom of supposed to be 3 loving babies.. My eldest is 7. Followed by my 2y/o princess. Last year, I miscarried. 16weeks.. I felt so sad that time.. Then after 3mos I got pregnant again. I was so happy, excited but also scared at the same time. Last May 24 I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. We called him Dos. But the very next day God took him already. He had neonatal pneumonia and had difficulty in breathing. He was not able to recover from it. I am soo devastated. Im so lost. Losing your child is the most painful experience one could ever have. The pain is unbearable. Until now, I cannot stop crying. My mind is filled with what ifs and what could have been.. Im so hopeless. Depression has taken the best of me. I dont think I would still heal. All I wanted now is to have my baby Dos back..