perfect dad

For one, if others view you as a responsible father and husband, I’m pretty sure you are doing a fine job! Set realistic standards for yourself. Recognize that you do not need to be the “perfect” dad/husband, just one whom your wife and daughter need. It is perfectly normal for you not to know how to handle things. Babies/children are often unpredictable (and every child is different), and it is impossible for anyone to know how to handle everything. Enjoy this process of learning together with your wife and also share with other fathers around to learn from each other. Also, do not neglect having some me-time. Take turns looking after your daughter with your wife so that you each can have some time for yourself (e.g., go exercise, meet up with friends etc). If you could get someone to help look after your baby for a few hours, go on a date with your wife. Take a break from being “father” and have some time as a “husband”, “son” and “friend”. Hang in there!!

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When a baby enters this world, much emphasis and attention is given to the new mother and baby, to help them heal, adjust and grow. It is easy to overlook another member of the family that is undergoing change as well -- the daddy. Most first-time dads experience stress because of sleep deprivation, change in routines and their own apprehensions about parenting. So yeah, it's normal to have your doubts. But you shouldn't let it engulf you. Perhaps you should look for an outlet where you can share your stress. Communicate with your wife, share your feelings with her. Or, you can seek support and advice from a father support group or a friend who is or has gone through this stage in life. You'd be surprised to find out that a lot of first time daddies feel the same way as you do. My best friend's husband is lucky to have a group of friends who became dads around the same time he did and they meet up every now and then for mommy-free play dates haha.

hey daddy...first up, stop beating yourself up so much. if others are looking at you as a responsible father and husband, it definitely means you are doing a great job in both the roles :) stop feeling so bad and pressuring yourself. instead, if you want to get more hands on, tell your wife about it. she will love and respect you the more for it. you could take over some diaper duties, or bottle feeding time, or story reading time maybe? these are also great ways to bond with your baby. in the meanwhile, take your me time and relax a bit too :) and don't battle it, but live this new phase of being a dad, while maintaining your own self as well.

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I agree with @darius. Accepting is the best way to move forward. Your wife and daughter have placed all the faith in you as a responsible father so stop doubting yourself. You mean their world. As you lost your individuality, your wife is in the same boat as you, so talk to her :) Take it as another phase of life that has its own set of challenges and positives. You can do it!!

First - suck it up. (Sorry) Second - communicate so your wife understands (we men are extraordinarily bad at it) Third - let's grab a beer :)

my life revolves around my kidz but it is a personal choice & there is no such thing as a perfect dad/mom/child... but we can all try our best 💗

yes, it is very normal but also take some time off for yourself!

thanks