How do you politely tell your friend that he/she is not invited in your wedding when they ask?

hahaha just say you didn't print enough invitation cards. mmm, i think this question is quite cultural also. Chinese weddings, by common execution these days are usually at a restaurant or hotel with limited seating. So like, who you pick to come would matter more because it's not a revolving door system like you come in, you makan then leave then the next guest can take your seat and eat and so on. Very different from malay weddings, where it's high volume of people, but they all sorta play rotate lol. Finish eating, leave their seats, go see bride and groom, give their well wishes and congratulations and head off from the wedding. So there would always be empty seats. I don't know what kind of wedding you're going to have, and what the expectations are from your husband/in-laws/parents/family/friends. But honestly you can sidestep anything by just saying it's not in the budget lol. Fancy restaurant dinner but only 200 guests? "Hey bae why didn't you invite me?" "Oh, we could only afford to get 200 guests and we decided to stick with just family" "Oh okay thx xoxo" Is how I would imagine the conversation to go ah. I'm a guy so most of my peers/colleagues who didn't get to attend I just tell them sorry ya'll it was a small event, bonus haven't come in so cannot book bigger venue hahahaha. But yeah, tbh i'd stick with 'we didn't plan to invite everyone/ we decided to have a wedding within our means/ my grandma gets anxiety issues with crowds that are more than 200 in number" People will understand, if they don't, then just straight up tell them your wedding or my wedding? I pay or you pay? Don't worry la, people in your life that ask these kinds of things are usually temporary, your partner isn't.

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I will be frank and explain the reason. Most people understand that there is a limit to the number of friends one can invite after taking into consideration family, relatives, family friends etc. My wedding was a small and low-key affair. Only close friends were invited and I did not get anyone outside the invite list asking about it. Some of my friends have a "backup" list. Perhaps if you are considering inviting that friend (if someone on your main invite list is unable to attend), you could simply tell your friend that you are still working on the invite list and it is not finalized yet?

I'd tell them that the wedding is really small (which it is, 120 pax, very small in malay standards) and it's just family and my wedding entourage. My family in itself is big so there'll barely be room to invite my close friends, let alone the "so-so" friends. People should stop obsessing about whether a non invite to a wedding is equivalent to a slight. Sometimes there's simply no room and at the end of the day, it's the bride and groom's day.

If you're not accommodating this friend of yours, then it means that they are simply not close enough to you. And since a wedding is a major development in your life, they would naturally understand your predicament. The best way is to be honest and tell them that you are having a low-key wedding and have invited only close friends and family. Nobody will fight with you about not being invited if you're honest.

I would be honest and upfront about it that you are keeping it to a certain group. As much as people want to be involved in weddings and celebrations, I happen to believe that it should be as private as the couple wants it to be. This friend should respect that he simply didn't make the cut. If he wants to celebrate with you, there are many ways to demonstrate his support outside of attending the wedding.

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It's a polite way to tell them directly that the number of guests is limited and you were not the only one who decided whom to invite. You only had a certain number of family and friends that you can invite and as much as you want to accommodate all of them, you have to consider the limited seats as well. I trust your friend will understand the situation.