How do you let you mum-in-law know that you will be calling the shots on the upbringing of your child (without sounding rude)?

If my husband has the same thinking, then I will leave it to him to let his mum know that we will be taking care of the baby in our own way. If not, then I'll talk to my mum-in-law directly but together with my husband and let them know that I wish to bring the baby up in my own way and I don't wish to use the traditional methods of raising a child on my baby. If they would like to feed the baby anything, please let me know first. If at anytime they wish to carry the baby or play with her I would be more than willing of course.