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By 4 years old, I feel that it's important to establish a regular meal time. Here is a menu sample that I got from the article that I've linked below. BREAKFAST - 1 small whole-wheat bagel spread with 1 tbs. nut or seed butter - 1/2 cup fruit salad LUNCH - 1/2 turkey-and-cheese sandwich on whole-wheat bread - Yellow pepper strips with 2 tbs. low-fat ranch dressing - 1/2 cup sliced strawberries DINNER - 2 oz. fish (such as cod or tilapia) - 1/2 cup cooked brown rice - 4 asparagus spears roasted in olive oil SNACKS - 1/4 cup hummus and 10 baby carrots - 1 small box raisins When my daughter was 4, she eats when we eat, no exceptions so she knew that if she missed any meal time or doesn't finish her food, there's no food until the next meal time. Here's an article for better understanding: http://www.parents.com/recipes/nutrition/how-much-does-my-kid-need-to-eat/
For 4 years old, food is important for a healthy growing. Thus, breakfast, lunch, teatime/snacks, and dinner are crucial for their age. Regarding how much is the portion, it depends on individual child. For my daugther, she is a small eater while her brother is a big eater. Just like adult, some adults take in larger portions while others are just a small eater in nature. Thus, you need to see your child's clue on whether she/he is full already.
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I will a standard portion to my 4yo. If he is hungry, he will ask for more. They must be able to learn to ask for food and look for food when they are hungry.
I believe at 4 years old your child should be able to talk. He or she should be able to tell you and converse by then.
thanks