I had a panic attack.

Question

My face 2 days after my worst panic attack and I am grateful that God is always faithful. Akala ko mamamatay na ko. 😅 Noon, tamang panginginig lang ng kamay, ng katawan. Nakukuha ng hilamos at hingang malalim. But that Friday night was different from my previous attacks. Para akong binangungot ng gising. Namanhid ang buong katawan ko, my jaw clenched and I cannot feel myself anymore. I thought it was the end. Thank you Lord for my mother-in-law and sisters-in-law for being there. Baka kung ano na nangyari sakin.If you will ask my family, SINO BA SI HERMIE? Sasabihin nila palaban, hindi natatakot i-express ang sarili, masyadong matapang, very open sa nararamdaman at hindi nagtatanim ng sama ng loob. Rebelde, palasagot, makatwiran and all. But that was Hermie 7 years ago. So, who am I now? Honestly, I really dont know. The Hermie now overthinks A LOT, do not defend herself, not as expressive as before. In short, hindi ko na kilala ang sarili ko. I became overly emotional over things na hindi naman dapat bigyan ng halaga. I became sensitive in a bad way. Nasan na yung Hermie 7 years ago? Yung Hermie na kaya sabihin ng derecho na PAGOD NA KO. GALIT AKO. MASAYA AKO. MALUNGKOT AKO. AYOKO NA. Nasan ka na? Hahaha! Anyare na sayo? Miss na kita. 🥲And then a friend asked me, ayaw mo ba magpagamot? AYOKO. Hahaha. Baka may biglang mag react. Gawing katatawanan na naman ang kalagayan ko sabihan ako na gumagawa ako ng kwento. Sana nga ganun na lang. Na gumagawa lang ako ng kwento. Kasi ang hirap hirap na. Yung wala namang reason para maranasan mo to pero dahil ang daming nakaka trigger sa kalagayan mo, susumpungin ka. Nakakasawa din ha. But I am beyond blessed that I am able to surpass EVERYTHING. By Gods grace I know lahat ito lilipas din. Lahat ito makakaya. Lahat ito, mawawala at babalik din sa normal ang mga bagay. My faith is still bigger than my fear. Ill be okay soon. For now, I just need to accept that I am not okay, and its okay not to be okay. ❤#FightAnxiety #MentalHealthMatters #StopMentalHealthShaming #HopeIsWaving

Carla Dingle Balucas · Answer

Hi Hermie!Im not a mental health expert but Ive had a few friends who had mental health issues. Its never easy. The kindest words and deeds are not enough to ease the burden. But not everyday is a rainy day. I know youll see your sunshine too! Id like to share an article that might help. Please see the link below. Keep fighting! Soon all of these will be over.https://www.jw.org/tl/library/magasin/g201412/sakit-sa-isip/