In-laws

Does anyone have issues with parents-in-law? My LO (currently 5 months old) is taken care by my MIL when me and hubby is at work. My MIL used to be a babysitter so she’s quite good at babies. However, she got her own set of pantangs and way of educating the child, which is very different from me. I don’t believe in pantangs at all. She doesn’t believe in what We say when we explain to her. For example, there was once baby did not poo for a week, she got so ganchiong and kept calling over the weekend telling us to try this try that. We already explained to her nicely that this is normal for BF babies but her mindset is stuck with need to poo Everyday blablabla. This is just one example. Another example is, she kept saying baby should start on solids now. Me and my husband’s take is to follow baby’s cues, we don’t have a definite to start solids at 4 months or 6 months. We did try a little puree but feel that baby is not yet ready for it. But MIL keep saying that should start alr. So irritating? Sometimes, this really irritates me and I want to send my baby to infant care instead. Is like, why must I explain what I’m doing to her and why she keep giving suggestions that I don’t want to hear. I have my own style in doing things and parenting. But my hubby refuses as infant care is expensive and he thinks it’ll be better for baby to be under grandma’s care. I do agree with him but I think it’s only for my sanity. ? Does anyone has similar experience?

127 Replies
 profile icon
Write a reply

Bcoz these old ppl think they eat salt more den we eat rice! As they have raise their children up and they are so big now.. And they only believe they are always rite. But they dont know that their salt have long expired!! I also having issue with my inlaws bcoz of this covid19. They say i am selfish for not letting my son visit them. They themselves are the selfish 1 that put my son's life at risk! As an adult, parent and grandparents they should encourage their children n grandchildren not to go out. But they are not. These stubborn old ppl brain are full of expired salt.. haix...

Read more
2y ago

My in laws encouraged us not to go out but they are out almost everyday and visited us and even carried my baby without washing hands.

I don't have any problems with my in laws. Ang nag iisang problema ko lang ang mismong Tatay ko. Lagi siyang kontra sa lahat ng ginagawa namin para sa dalawang anak namin ng asawa ko. Alam ko naman na concern siya bilang Lolo ng dalawang anak ko. Pero minsan wala na sa lugar yung pangsesermon niya sa amin mag asawa. Kunware, gusto lang namin igala yung first born namin, nakakontra agad siya kesyo "wala helmet ang bata" okaya "wag niyo isasakay sa motor yan" like hello? Kami po ang magulang, hindi naman kami ganun katanga para ipahamak ang anak namin. Tapos sobrang selan sa mga playmates ng first born ko. Jusko! Ang hirap pakisamahan ng ganitong klaseng ama. Kung may malilipatan lang kami ng asawa ko, aalis na kami dito.

Read more

My in laws (especially my MIL) are somewhat like that only that she die die ask me to give my baby nestum at 3mnths just so he will be a rly fat baby. she say its cute tht babies are fat. its true fat babies are cute but my baby was already overweight for a 3mnth old. when i firmly rejected it, she says im being ignorant as a first time mom just because she used to do that to her kids. i firmly told her that my baby is already overweight and i dont want him to get heavier as im the only one taking care of him and i dont want to follow her say. and also, i hate it when she compares my baby with other ppl’s babies. so what i’ll do is, just tell my husb to tell her & just act as if you hear ntg from her.

Read more

Get your hubby to tell her instead. Ur hubby needs to explain to her n get her to understand. Is the son n father job to be the middle person for such situation. I’m gg to be a mum soon.. n I stay with my in laws.. so during 2nd trim I keep telling my hubby what I’m doing during confinement n how I want baby to grow up under me. I also hinted my in laws.. keep repeating.. there are bound to be disagreements but if the disagreements are slight we try to let it go.. but if it goes really bad.. I tell my hubby off the baby go to infant care.. because I don’t Wan to sour relationship between son n parents.. if u can respect me then the poor baby needs to go infant care..

Read more
TapFluencer

I never let my mil take care of my baby. so whenever I go to work, my husband calls my mil to go over my place. Omg when my baby was 3 months, my mil wanted me to start giving him cereal. N the worse part is, she told me that we should try give him tea n coffee.??? I was like, are u out of ur mind. N I strictly said no water till 6 months. But when I wasn't ard, she tried giving him water. He puked. And my baby hates pacifier. But my mil forces the pacifier in his mouth n he vomitted.. so irritating

Read more
10mo ago

Yeaa why in laws nowadays keep interfering and so busy wants to give water to baby who’s not even 1 yet! So annoying and frustrating!

i would suggest infant care too.. cos my baby was taken care by my mil she didnt even want to listen to what i said. my aunt have told me not to do things like eg cooked baby's meal one shot at a goal for lunch and dinner as this will cos him to have bloated tummy.. she even placed half of the portion in the fridge to recooked it when it is dinner time. i told her what my aunt said she say there is no such things and asked me don't listened to what my aunt said. i feel like ........ its v difficult to live with her as well.. whatever i cooked for my baby she def will have many comments... and i am the mum! i know how to handle my kids lo

Read more

I would go with infant care. I’m pregnant so i moved out cuz my fiancé’s mom is an alcoholic. We in the room she drunk n angry then throw ceramic bowl towards our room. Then the shards also fly in. Like hello I pregnant sia... also she abused him as a kid so I don’t want her around my future baby so i left. But MILs are a pain. Pregnant still will make u climb up to hang things. I nearly fell too. If infant care don’t want then put to private nanny. If u feel ur baby isn’t safe, do what u must. If ur husband working, tell him either put to infant care or u quit ur job to babysit. Hopefully he’ll chose infant care

Read more

I would really vote to send baby to infant care. As I think they can learn stuff there also. And in this case u can have less conflict with ur MIL. I feel we have our own way of bringing up our kids! So tiring to have to explain to them (i mean why do we even have to explain to them such things. it’s our parenting choice isn’t it) they are our child not theirs to begin with. We can respectfully take their advice but they should also listen to our ways of doing things. Send infant care won’t have further disagreements with ur hub also. Working mum got $600 subsidy. Anyway baby gonna to kindergarten sooner or later mah.

Read more

Same here!but for now me n hubby live in diff city from PIL which makes me feel very grateful.luckily its because of work but ironically i’ve asked for transfers back to hometown where they also live.this matter concerns me a lot since hubby planning to ask MIL to take care of our baby.but judging from the way how she always trying to correct every thing that i’ve done to our baby makes me feel annoyed.somehow the best thing to do is maybe ask your mom to take care of your baby if infant care is an issue for your hubby.if we needs to take care of their feelings then who will take care of ours?xoxo💚

Read more

My MIL asked me to feed my baby who was only 2.5 months old water. She bugged me about it and asked who told me that baby cannot drink water. She asked was it a doctor’s advice. I simply answered yes and still she continued for few days until I sent her an article that explains it can cause water intoxication and harm the baby. Then finally she stopped! My husband didn’t want his mother to take care of our baby due to her age (70++) but my reason was same as yours. We have different style and ways in parenting. I’d rather pay someone to babysit to prevent from having any arguments with my MIL.

Read more