Ask the Expert: dealing with and preventing racism

Hi there, first, we should call out and address racism or discrimination when you see it, and always practice kindness in your daily lives. When you see something, say something—both the good, the bad and how things can change for the better—and your kids will learn to do the same. This may mean calling out a family member or a friend who makes a racist joke or comment and no longer ignoring uncomfortable subjects at social gatherings. Children observe and learn a lot from their parents’ interactions and what isn’t said directly to them. Give them the tools to do the same when they encounter racism at school or among peers. It doesn’t have to be confrontational.

Hi Jessica, you can start by practicing “positive noticing” at home, where you identify something your child can do well, then work on developing and mastering that skill. This creates positive emphasis on strengths, rather than weakness. We should also practice “positive language” at home, where we prioritise telling and showing our children how much we love them unconditionally, and give them the security that will eventually help them in tough situations. Allowing our children to make mistakes and failures can also teach confidence, as well as important life lessons that will help them grow and develop to make responsible and moral life choices in the future.

Hi Kacy, our own upbringing has contributed to ideas and beliefs about race and discrimination. Understanding your own attitudes is the first step toward confronting those ideas. If you want to raise anti-racist kids, you need to begin practicing what you want to see in your children. Modelling good behaviours include challenging your own biased beliefs and continuing to seek new information are good examples to set for your kids. Children learn through what they see from their parents. Remember that being anti-racist doesn't mean that you have to be entirely free of bias yourself. A large part of this involves examining your own ideas, confronting your biases, and then actively working to change those beliefs.