Ask the Expert: building a healthy attachment

Attachment refers to an emotional bond between a child and his or her parent, with its purpose being to make a child safe, secure and protected. To answer your questions on attachment and why it is a foundation for your child's development, we have Yasmeen Kassim - child psychologist, who will be our Expert for this session 👩🏼‍⚕️ So leave your questions in the comment section below before the session on 28 September (Monday)! 🤩

Ask the Expert: building a healthy attachment
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Expert

50 years of research has shown that children with a secure attachment: • Enjoy more happiness with their parents • Feel less anger at their parents • Get along better with friends • Have stronger friendships • Are able to solve problems with friends • Have better relationships with brothers and sisters • Have higher self-esteem • Know that most problems will have an answer • Trust that good things will come their way • Trust the people they love • Know how to be kind to those around them

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I plan to have the grandparents look after my child when I return to work. Is this helpful for the child in building a healthy attachment with myself/ hubby? What can my hubby & I do to build a healthy attachment with so much time away? Thanks!

4y ago

:) my pleasure

Can there be “too much” or “too little” when it comes to attachment? What are the warning signs that parents should take note of before “too much” or “too little” attachment becomes an issue in their child’s future?

4y ago

of course, well-meaning parents may also overdo it, believing they need to meet the child’s every request, which can be exhausting and counterproductive. A secure attachment also involves your child feeling secure enough to explore the world, essential to growth and development. So allow them to explore, and give them the room to fail. When they do, they trust that they can come back to you for support.

Hi Doctor. What is Secure Attachment? What are the long term impacts of a secure attachment? What does my child need?

4y ago

A secure attachment has at least three functions: (1) Help a child feel safe when frightened or uncomfortable, (2) Help a child feel secure enough to explore the world, essential to growth and development, (3) Help a child accept, and regulate his/her emotional experience. To develop a secure attachment is responding to a baby’s needs so that they can develop confidence in getting their needs met by their parents and caregivers.

Hello dr. thank you for doing this session. how to make our children understand between what's right and what's wrong

4y ago

You can teach your child what type of behaviour is acceptable and what type is not acceptable in an empathetic, loving and respectful manner that will strengthens the connection between parent and child. You can start by explaining to your child, using examples. Most children will want to test limits and boundaries which are quite normal. If need be, you can implement consequences or other forms of discipline to manage behaviour. Feel free to email [email protected] if you have more questions.

What are some things to look out for to know that I am on the right track of building attachment with my little one?

4y ago

One way is to observe how your child reacts when you drop them off at school/ playdates. A securely-attached child will be likely to explores the room freely when you are present, he/she may be distressed when you leave, but happy when you return.

Will children be confused with us (parents) and grandparents style of attachment?

4y ago

Research has shown that children start developing a preference for their mothers in infancy, then thereafter their fathers, and other caregivers, in that order. Ideally everyone would respond to child’s needs. But what is most important is that mum and dad are able to in consistent ways.

What are some ways to build attachment with children from young?

4y ago

respond to your baby’s needs in warm, sensitive and consistent ways. As a baby, their needs are to protect them from physical, mental and emotional harm and that they can count on you, comfort them when they are distressed. As they grow older, their needs become more complex. But what is important is to continue to be aware of and meet their needs.

What are the different attachment styles

4y ago

There are four types of infant-parent attachment: three ‘organized’ types (secure, avoidant and resistant) and one ‘disorganized’ type. Longitudinal research has shown that having a secure attachment to at least one primary caregiver is important for a child’s social, emotional and cognitive development

what do you recommend as ideal?