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OMG! I feel u for the second part where the FIL doesnt noe how aim properly etc . For mine was worse, other than that, he doesnt even flush the toilet! And he doesnt even bring the seat up. Once , my husband told him to bring it up coz is unhygienic, guess what his father replied to him? " Take it up urself la " Like wtf ? Are u that dumb to not know the basic hygiene ? Even a kid know the basic hygiene rules . I was so annoyed. For the solid food , i hope i dont need to face such issues coz my baby have yet to come out but Im rlly not in good terms w his family after alot of things happened. Especially his mother go on insisting if my husband and I get our new hse, it's hers and we have to stay this current old hse of theirs . Thats so stupid . And his father go on w insisting us putting our address here so he can get more money from gov . Absurd .

Best to avoid confrontation. Even if you tell them nicely, high chances of your in laws will still misunderstand you as being disrespectful to them. Best option is to talk to or WhatsApp or texr ur hubby to tell his parents or your FIL about not to smoke when your child is around, etc.... Such situations, once the misunderstanding starts, it's difficult to salvage that strained relationship again, especially with elderly folks.. Be careful when handling such situations with in law. Just my thoughts.

Try not to be too confrontational like “you are doing it wrong” “your method don’t work” “Can u don’t do that” and etc. sometimes we need to be reminded that they are the elders after all, still must give some respect in order for them to listen to us. Try another way like, “LO prefers this method” “this method works better maybe you can try”. Be positive and patience! I know it is frustrating but we need to find a balance in managing in laws

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Is it possible to stay on your own instead of relying on your in-laws? Get a helper to help since it’s almost impossible for your in-laws to change. Old habits die hard. If you really cannot bear with them, just don’t stay with them.

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Jiayou

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