BABY GIRL , AGAIN ?

Some may say, " it's still a blessing " Some may say, " at least you can conceive, think about those who can't but really want to " Some may say, " gender doesn't matter " YES, I get it! I know... I repeat, I KNOW. But deep inside my heart, " I've always wanted a boy " * sigh * My husband too... my family. Hi, I'm a young mommy. I got married at 20 years old and I had a daughter. When the first time I got to know that I'm pregnant, I thought I'm going to give birth to a son but I was wrong. Disappointed yes, but slowly I can accept the fact cause no matter what she's my bloodline and I love her. In my family, the first child is always a son but I shouldn't be surprise because in my husband's family... it's a daughter and more daughters. I took family planning after giving birth to my daughter and soon after that my husband wanted a second child and he said, " let's try for a son " I agreed. I got pregnant soon after 1 month of trying, guess we're both young so it's easier to conceive 🤔 I am currently 5 months pregnant, I'm so happy. I still don't know the gender though and I'm so nervous to know... I don't want to put so much hope cause most of my symptoms are showing that it's going to be a girl again... people in my surroundings was saying things like, " Oh you're craving sweet stuffs, it's going to be a girl again " " It looks like you're having a girl " Argh.. just stop! Don't tell me things that I already know 🥺 I told my husband, " What if it's not what we expected, YOU expected ? " He forced himself to smile and said, " It's okay. " but I know him very well that he really wanted a son. I'm just afraid that he could leave me if I can't bare him a son. My grandfather once did that to my grandmother but it was the opposite, she couldn't bare him a daughter instead. I'm tired of trying, I have no interest in trying for the third one. Please, I'm a career woman... and honestly I can't bare to have a lot of kids. People are saying things like, " Keep trying " I can't. Honestly, my personal expenses are quite high and I wanted to give my children the BEST. 2 kids are enough for me 😌 I don't want to have so many kids and what? Can't afford their wants / needs ? I'm sorry it's just my observation... certain people can't stop giving birth and end up not being able to care for all their kids nor have enough for their needs. I don't want to be like that...