Had a diff level of understand of husband after baby arrived

Did you communicate with your husband and talk things out? If no, I think you should set a time and sit down with him and list the concerns and unhappiness that you have been facing and also with reason supporting the issue. Start talking now if not yet, as issues will become conflicts and argument, which may lead to unhealthy relationship. Insist in using fan during confinement, to me he’s actually thinking of your health. Old myth is if you keep having aircon or fan blowing directly towards you, wind may get inside you, then when you are older will have a lot of issue. I don’t know how true. But during my confinement, I did on aircon cause it’s too damn hot to bare but the aircon is not blowing towards me, it’s blowing towards my husband so what I have is cool room, so I still perspire at night. Good and bad for yao lan - good is that you can no need to keep carrying your baby, which is not very good in long run. The more and longer you carry, the higher tendency your baby will wants you to keep carrying and don’t want to be put down even when sleeping. Bad is people doesn’t know how to control the strength and how far to go in swinging the yao lan, also people have the tendency to keep swinging when baby is obviously asleep. In fact if you want or you are ok for your baby to sleep in Yao lan, to pacify your baby to sleep on his/her own, tell him that mummy is putting you down to pay you to sleep, mummy is still here don’t be scared, then sit down and pat on his butt don’t really need to shake or swing the yao lan. As you pay his butt, the yao lan will move up and down but you control the strength of your patting. Never swing the yao lan to make your baby sleep - firstly if strength not control correctly, it’s harm to the baby’s brain; and secondly, they will be dependent on the swinging motion, so once you stop swinging they will wake up crying. Next, never wake up when baby cries, perhaps when talking to your husband why not set a timetable like Monday Wednesday Friday you wake up and deal with the baby, then Tuesday Thursday Saturday your husband help out, then Sunday if you don’t mind, you take up one extra day. He may feel that he has a responsibility now so will wake up when he heard baby cry. Oh, also on the day he will be looking after the baby, get him to sleep close to the baby. It works. Another way of arranging the night duty, if he’s going to work on weekday and since you are still on ML, weekday night duty you handle and weekend get your husband to do the night duty so that you can have enough rest too. It’s gonna be a long nights ahead, so try to arrange the night duty with your husband, it’s important otherwise you will suffer. Lastly, do you have your own house? Does he know that you don’t like to stay at your mil place and does he know the reason why? If no to everything, talk to him now. If yes to everything, bring it up again and ask him what is his concern for not moving out. Understand him first before making any judgement on his decision. Remember, communicate is the key and listening is also an important key to happy marriage happy family. When he’s talking, you listen. And you can only talk after he is done. And when you are fuming inside, tell yourself to calm down and talk peacefully. I know it’s difficult, but it can be done. You surely don’t want a conversation to end very badly. In fact by listening, you will tend to be able to get the most out of the situation and even have a solution to the situation and also understand your husband more. Jiayou💪🏻When you are angry, think of your baby, don’t blurt out words that you don’t mean it. It will hurt your partner and also you yourself.

hello mummy! congratulations to your little bundle of joy. in fact I do face similar situations like you when my lo is born. as much as we are first time mums, our husbands are first time dads as well and they are learning to adjust to their new roles. stay calm because you need a lot of rest to recuperate after birth! Happy mummy happy baby! suggest to have an open and calm chat with your hub to sort things out - we are all learning to be great parents together. jiayou!