Losyang na..

Just posting this to vent out. I know maraming mommies here na mas may legit stress than me so I’m sorry but please bear with me. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ganito ako recently pero madalas akong malungkot pag nakikita ko sarili ko at katawan ko. Siguro dahil sobrang busy these past few wks si hubby sa work to the point na wala na syang time halos samin,sa akin😕. Madalas sumagi sa isip ko nitong mga nakaraan,bakit kung kelan may partner ako,saka naman ako nalosyang😭. I was a single mom for 6.5yrs. Nagstart akong mag work when my daughter turned 14 months. I’m earning really well,merong hobbies,always with friends. Part ng work ko ang pagtatravel locally. All is well Nung naging kami ni hubby,pinatigil na nya ako sa work at sya na lang nagsupport sa family at daughter ko. In other words,nastuck na lang ako sa apat na sulok ng condo which was okay for me. Until nabuntis ako with our son. Ang dami lalong changes. Lalo na sa sarili ko,sa katawan ko,sa itsura ko. Hindi naman ako mahilig talagang mag ayos pero mejo okay naman ako before and at least before,naaalagaan ko ang katawan ko. Ngayon grabe🤦🏼‍♀️ Stretchmarks,dry skin,baby pouch,eyebags,hairfall. Feeling ko mukha na lang akong yaya ng anak ko. Don’t get me wrong,sobrang walang problema kay hubby. I’m very well provided. He still cooks food for me in between his busy hours,he still hugs me and tells me I’m pretty. He still thanks me for being a good and strong mom for our son pero deep inside,I can’t shake that feeling of being disappointed with myself. While browsing my gallery,I noticed na I don’t even take pictures of myself anymore. Puro picture ng anak ko. Habang nawiwili akong mag alaga ng anak ko,habang lumalalim yung love ko sa kanila,nawawalan na din pala ako ng panahon na mahalin at alagaan sarili ko. I love my family,no questions about that. But I just miss my old self. I feel incomplete and lost right now. Just sad. Just sharing some photos of me for self appreciation. First photo was taken very recently while the last 3 were before I met my husband

Marra Abogado-Kim

2 KoPino kids| Rainbow mama| SAHM | Korean-Pinoy Family

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Reading all these replies made my heart melt. It feels really sad to learn that I’m not the only one whose going through these but it’s quite comforting as well. Especially ang comment ng mga mommies na nakakaranas din ng ganitong feeling but still positive. I’ve been in denial na sobrang insecure ko talaga after I gave birth. I was known by my friends and family as the girl who doesn’t get insecure. I was known as the one who always makes people laugh. I was that friend who gives comforting advises. I was that friend who was always positive. But yesterday I just lost it. It was being too much for me to bear and that’s why you’re reading this post rn. I read all the replies. Everything. And I wanna thank this app and especially the moms here na ready’ng ready to lift each other up. Sobrang thank you for letting me release all these negativity that’s been bottling up since I don’t know when. Sobrang thank you for not judging me but for understanding and sharing your sentiments as well. I appreciate each and everyone of you mga inay. Your words and your encouragements. Such a big big help for this momma whose been confused,disappointed,disheartened and insecure. Thank you for not letting me feel alone❤️. Thank you❤️❤️❤️

Magbasa pa

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