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In most families I know, there's really rivalry among the children. I believe the biggest factor to this is the upbringing within the family. Among us 3 siblings, I can say that we grew up with no rivalry because both my parents never made anyone of us felt insecure in one way or another. i really don't know how they did it but I'm just so amazed. I grew up seeing them that they really did everything they can to provide for each one of us and give the attention needed by every child. I know this rarely happens and I'm thankful that we are part of the few siblings who don't live in envy with one another.
It's inevitable na magakroon ng rivalry among siblings. As parents, we have to be the role model to them. We have to try our very best to show them that they are all of equal importance in the family, that they are all loved on the same level by both parents. Kaya lang naman ngkakaroon ng rivalry ay dahil madalas nati-trigger pa kapag merong ngpaparamdam sa knila na dapat may ikainggit sa ibang kapatid. Kapag may misunderstanding, it is important that we listen fairly to both sides.
Let each child feel that he/she is appreciated despite his weaknesses. As parents, we have to acknowledge that each of our children has their own strengths and weaknesses, and it's not good to compare them with one another. Always let them feel that they are secured and loved because it avoids the feeling of insecurity. In return, they will also learn how to love their siblings.
Di naman maiiwasan ang rivalry among siblings. What we do is teach them this principle: your brother is more important than (whatever yung pinagaawayan nila). That way naiinstill sa kanila na mas importante ang isa't isa over anything and naiiwasan maging selfish.
As the parent, don't take sides. Even if one is clearly correct, say it in a way that doesn't make the others feel bad. Say it more in the context of the situation rather than explicitly saying that someone's right and the others are wrong.
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It's super important to show each one of them that they are loved and valued. MInsan hindi naman maiiwasan ang rivalry pero dapat kausapin ang both parties na walang mabuting idudulot ang pag-iiringan :)
Make them feel loved and treat them fairly. Spend time with each of them. If ever there is any misunderstanding, talk to the concerned parties so it will be resolved.