Once a cheat always a cheat? What's everyone's opinion

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First you gotta under why they cheated. Most people, infact i think you could say everyone who cheats, DO NOT INTEND TO GET CAUGHT. They do it because they think they can get away. I mean, would you throw away a 5 year relationship for a quick bang? Most people wouldn't. But you factor in that get-out-jail free card where you could do anything and not get caught? a lot more heads would turn. I'm not saying it's forgivable, or that you should hang on to a cheat, heck my ex wife cheated on me with her colleague, found them when i went to pick her up at her office. But I could understand why she thought she could get away with it. She's there 8-9 hours a day, i'm totally on the other side of the country working, bam. Victimless crime, not so much. If you can understand why and who they cheated with maybe you might have a better context to make a call on it. But if you don't, sucks like hell yo.

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For me, I feel that I can never forgive a person who cheats. But this is because of my neurotic personality. I could foresee myself not being able to trust the person again. Even if the person is capable of change, there will be a constant lingering air of doubt that would be detrimental to the relationship. Hence, it is more an issue of trust to me. Once broken, it will be very difficult to earn it back. The precedence has been set and it is unlikely I will be able to let it go so easily. Still, this is my opinion based on my personality. I do hope that people can change and that once a cheat doesn’t necessarily means he/she will always be a cheat.

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I think it's a case by case basis. I cannot say it depends on the cheater alone. The partner who keeps on forgiving can also be a factor for the cheater to continuously have an affair. However, I believe that a person can cheat once (for whatever reason that maybe) and can be forgiven. But, if he/she cheats twice, three times or more than, oh dear, his/her partner should not in any way, forgive. Trust is one of the main pillars of a relationship and a cheater certainly does not have that.

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The phrase may have some truth to it, but it also suggests that people are incapable of change and remorse. I honestly think that it's not true in most cases -- people can change, it's a matter of whether they want to or not. To me, cheating is a pattern with immature people. I know such immature people who have since matured, got their act together, and become faithful, loving spouses. That being said, I've seen others who just continue to spiral in their cheating patterns.

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I think it won't be fair to generalize and say in absolute terms that cheaters will always be cheaters. I think the root of infidelity runs much deeper and it's different for each person. But based on what I've seen from relatives/friends who've been cheated on, this statement seems to be true. It's sad but unless a cheater confronts those deep personal issues and stops blaming their partners, they can never break free from the vicious cycle.

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While this may be true in some cases, the definition of cheating is subjective. Cheating once also does not mean that one would repeat it often or that it has something to do with the partner. Infidelity can occur anytime in a relationship but you must decide whether you want to continue going down that path or really understand the root cause of the problem and work on it in your relationship. To each his own.

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This morning my wife opened a package she received in the mail and put on a sexy lingerie set and put her clothes on over it. She then got a sexy Pink Back pack and put something in it. Mind you my wife has not spoken to me or slept with me in well over a month. I then dropped the kids off at school and her at work. Do you think she is cheating? A few months ago she asked me if she could sleep with other men!

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3y ago

This doesn’t conclude that she is cheating. I suggest to have a open conversation. Go on a date, spend time with her and then share what you are feeling

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Everyone make mistakes, in my opinion there are many reasons behind everything. All we need to do is listen why could that happen and find a way to fix everything together if your partner is cheating, i think the first thing you need to do is not to let this problem spread. Sometimes you think you will need people's opinion but trust me, it will make everything worse..

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...depends on your level of tolerance. I let people do bad things to me once or twice. I blame myself and think why things happen. I'll try to think on the other person's perspective and try making sense of everything. Try to compromise and all. But comes the third time, I'll make sure to give an unforgettable parting "scene" and throw everything away. 3:) bwahahaha.

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Cheating, and infidelity in general, are such complex things that can't be understood in simple terms. Psychologist Esther Perel did a really illuminating Ted Talk that tackled Infidelity and its complexity which I think everyone should watch: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2AUat93a8Q