I've always thought I am able to handle 2 children when my 2nd child arrived 2 months ago. Things is not not gg well especially I feel I have been very harsh with my 5 yrs old boy recently. While I am trying very hard to bond with my LO , the elder one will start to speak very loud at home and will go disturb the baby when he is asleep soundly. Recently, teacher told me the elder one hit someone at childcare and when I ask him nicely , he is totally not willing to talk about it. He does not have this kind of record in school before. When I talk to him , he will just immense himself into his fav TV cartoon and would not answer or pay little attention to my words. Sometimes , he is rude to my mum too. I am starting to worry about his character.... At few times , he pushed me to my limits and I could not tolerate and swear in front of him . I know I shouldn't be and feel ashamed at myself .Things seems to change a lot after the LO arrived . In the past I have read many parenting books in order to be the best mum I could.But I feel like I have failed just been a good mum after all and I feel so angry with him that I told him I don't love him anymore.My husband scolded me for my mean words and I really regretted. At the same time , I really want to give more attention to the little one which he really needs as an infant . I am torn and feel really tired as I also need to spend time with my elder one on his homework as he will be approaching K2 very soon. I need need some wise advices. Thanks

Anonymous

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It is definitely not easy handling two children. Guess you will need to try and find a balance. Firstly, don't be too hard on yourself as you are probably doing the best you can. Secondly, while the baby needs a lot of care and attention, the older child needs your attention too. Try explaining to your number one that he is now the older brother and should help mummy take care of his younger brother. Also, always assure him that mummy still loves him and that no one could replace him in your heart. Thirdly, like I've mentioned, try to strike a balance. Be sure to spend some alone time with your firstborn too. He needs time to adjust to having a sibling and needs plenty of assurance that nothing much has changed despite the new addition to the family. Hence, both you and your husband could spend time alone with him to assure him that he still matters a lot to both of you. It will not be easy with the demands of looking after the newborn. But it is very important to ensure that everyone in the family can adapt to the change positively. Hang in there mummy!!

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Home Just Mums ive always thought i able handle 2 children when 2nd child arrived 2 months ago things not not gg especially i feel i have been very harsh with 5 yrs old boy recently while i trying very hard bond with lo elder start speak very loud home go disturb baby when asleep soundly recently teacher told elder hit someone childcare when i ask him nicely totally not willing talk about does not have kind record in school before when i talk him immense himself