Employer things vs Helper things

Question

Sorry for the long post. Im a first time employer and not sure where to draw the line with all the daily stuffs..kindly share with me your experience. 1. All the food in the fridge ranging from packet drinks to ice cream, do u allow your helper to eat them? My helper did request to me and I didnt know what to react and just say yes.2. Tidbits and snacks, helper requested if she can eat I also said yes as I didnt know what to reply3. As my hubby doesnt want helper to cook and want her to focus on LO only, we always order delivery or buy takeaway. Helper requested to choose the food she want before buying for her. Sometimes we let her choose sometimes we just buy. 4. If her shampoo, body wash etc. ran out am I obliged to buy for her? When she started work my hubby asked me to buy 2 pairs of slippers for her (1 for cleaning toilet and another one for her to wear outing however she already have a pair of outing slippers not sure y I need to get another one for her which I already did, I need to get things from Watsons and helper happily took body lotion those $2 from Watsons shelves and told me she need cotton bud I get for her too. Am I obliged to get all these for her? (which I alrdy did)5. Handling my LO (on her 1st week she started kissing my LO on his neck when she is alone with him, I saw from cctv and got quite pissed. Told her not to bring her face near LO but it seemed like she only followed for a week and then brought her face near LO again (although not kissing).6. Meals money how much do u give your helper to buy? For example we went down together and I let helper choose which stall she wants to eat and she chose the mixed veg rice. I gave her a $10 note. She ordered fish and seafood. The guy told her fish $2, seafood $2 she say ok. Also plus veg. Total $6. Do u think $10 for her to buy is it too much?7. Does yr helper wear your baby carrier and carry baby around? My helper does it and to be honest not very happy about it.8. When going out helper wants to carry baby and keep insisting (I did not allow), then who carry diaper bags and stuffs? Me? Funny?9. Helper is very proactive in taking care of my LO, often as and when I like to take over caring of my child like carry awhile or play with him or feed him, helper would very soon take him back, always cutting me short when I have not bond much with my LO yet. What should I do? Appreciate any form of advise pls thanks or any other things I should draw a line for a first time employer.

Louiz · Answer

Sorry I dont have a full time helper but your helper is little bit too much. Why kiss on peoples baby neck? Very DIRTY. If you think she shouldnt eat the ice cream tidbits etc, just says NO to her. She wont starve for not eating them. Its hard to change if it become an habit in the future. Maybe treat her once a while. Did she come without footwear?

Anonymous · Answer

the food n snacks in your fridge, if u r not comfortable with it say no, otherwise i would share but have to always ask first unless told otherwise. nothing wrong with her picking food imo but if u want to set boundaries, make her “top up” out of pocket if the food she picks is more than maybe $5-$8? otherwise i wouldn’t mind if she wants to pick every now n then. ask her what brand she uses for body wash n shampoo, don’t have to bring her out to buy, buy n tell her to use slowly, if finish within maybe 2weeks - 1month etc she will have to buy it again herself. when it comes to handling YOUR baby, that’s where i will be more strict as it is your child, if you’re not comfortable, say no, don’t allow it to happen, when it catch it, correct it immediately. give her an amount you’re comfortable with, if she exceeds that amount, she pays the remaining. carrier only to be used if u say so, otherwise NO.