I resigned from my work to be a SAHM this year, n hubby said since I'm a SAHM , I should be doing 100% of the housework n taking care of children n cooking etc. He won't lay a finger to help me cos he said he is in charge of bringing back the money for family .. is it supppsed to be like that ? How about his bonding time with the kids ? I'm so sad ?

I was the working mum while my husband was the stay at home dad. I worked 80 hours a week. I can tell you.. there’s no such thing as the stay-at-home person doing everything. It’s equally, if not more, tiring to look after the kid at home. Especially if the parent is dedicated and hands on (as opposed to just using TV and phones to distract the kid). And to add housework? That’s insane. When I got home, yes I was very tired, but as much as I could, I took over the care of baby to let my husband rest and recharge. My husband would try to ensure that I got some sleep during the night (I was still breastfeeding during the night for 6 months after I started working). We left housework for the weekends and helped one another out. If my husband got sick, I would take child care leave and take care of the baby so my husband could rest. We would cook if we had time, or buy back food if we didn’t. Both of us were able to duplicate each other’s roles for everything in baby care and household chores. Marriage and parenthood are a partnership. That doesn’t mean delegating roles and never crossing the boundaries. No, you’re a team. Put yourselves in each other’s shoes.. or ask him to try being the stay at home parent alone for 1 week while you go do a part time job. Because I’ve done both roles (working parent and stay at home parent), I can tell you with certainty that both are not easy, and if not for my husband’s strong support, I wouldn’t have been able to raise my children well and still be filled with joy and full of life. When both parties are willing to understand the challenges the other goes through, your marriage becomes stronger and your children are happier. My daughters are extremely close to my husband (both the toddler and the baby), and although I like it when my toddler listens to what I say, I’m even happier when she tells me or others, “Papa says ____, so I will do that.” I’m sure there are people who share the same sentiments as your husband, but I’d like to challenge them to be not just a man, but a real husband and father, and put their hearts into it. Because if they dare to accept this challenge, they’ll see a big difference in their own lives and the lives of their wives and children.