You can't compare your child with every other child -- all of them are different with a myriad of personalities. Your child could be a handful now but grow up to be a well behaved teen and it could be reversed for those people with well behaved kids (usually is i realised). Be firm and dole out soft punishments if needed such as time-out, take away his privileges like tv time, dessert etc if he doesn't behave after you have warned him. I've seen a friend who gives her child 3 chances in a day. She will warn him each time he acts out and once the child hits his "quota", she will punish him. Apparently this works and keeps the boy's naughtiness at bay because he doesn't know when his mom will call out his "chances".
Kids isually behave differently in front of in laws or hubby. I will teach and guide my kids separately and when I'm with them alone. Will educate them and guide them from right and wrong. You may also use positive words instead of "no" being a negative word.
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Spare the rod and spoil the child. Your call and decision whether to discipline your boy. However, when he starts to understand the cause of his actions, you can stop.
Rachel Yeo