No longer love my husband

Husband and I have too many differences. Many times I felt that he came from other world/planet *with my eye rolling* 1. With such hot weather, he only bath once a day. On my!!! 2. Every week I had to ask him to clean the floor,  wash the toilet & fan. When he wash toilet, he only wash the area that are dirty. When I keep quiet, he doesn't even bother washing. 3. I had to set a so called a time table for him to wash his hair & change his home clothes twice a week. Or else he can use the same clothes at home for 1 whole week! *he is working from home. 4. Our daughter is 1year old and he can't remember her birth cert and spelling of her name. 5. He doesn't shave daily. Recent incident, he only shave when his boss needed to meet him on zoom! 6. He always have to habit of giving our daughter her left over milk or food whenever she had enough or stop eating. Which I find it very irritating. 7. Whenever I am busy, I always had to ask him to help to change our girl's diaper when it's already full. He won't do it automatically. 8. He doesn't allow screen time for our girl. I understand but I feel that at times we can be flexible. Maybe once week during weekends or once a while give her 5-10mins of screen time. But he doesn't agree. 9. He has a very messy (and somewhat dirty /sticky) working table because he sweat and he doesn't clean his work area. Which I used to help him to clean once a week but I sort of give up already! There are many other things I really can't stand about him. I can never finish listing them down. Lets be fair to him. What I like about him. 1. He is financially stable. 2. He is mature. 3. He helps with washing of dishes. 4. He is not abusive. 5. Helps with marketing. Sorry for long rant. Thank you for reading.

9 Replies

When I first moved in with husband I think I got high blood pressure from getting angry daily at him. He doesn't help to do household chores at all. Leaves clothes lying around the house and dirtied the toilet so often. I tried telling him a lot of times but he doesn't listen so I've given up. But afterwards, I realise he doesn't do chores is because he doesn't know how.... I had to teach him how to use washing machine. Even now when he wash dishes also sometimes still oily. Toilet still dirty but after I gave up cleaning and he couldn't stand the dirtiness too he tried to clean now lol. I think a lot of the things you listed is more to do with hygiene and cleanliness but other than that I think he should be OK? Just try to communicate more. Nowadays my husband helps out with the chores so it's not impossible. As for caring for your daughter I think you should make him understand left over milk not that good and daiper should change when full. Tell him how would he feel if he has to wear pampers filled with pee and poop whole day. Not only smelly but uncomfortable. Unfortunately screen time wise I wouldn't want my kids to have any till they're older too. Dont give up on your marriage because of silly things like this. Good luck.

my dear, i think you are abit OCD and try to control. try to relax yourself, close one eye, you will be less tired. if got things you really cannot close eye, maybe u try to do it yourself. afterwards you sort of have achievement once done. really, dont over expect your hubby will do this do that, he will feel irritating, and you are the one that gonna tired by all your dislikes

well at least your husband isn't abusive, for mine case,we quarrelled and he kicked me in the stomach while I am having my menses that day 😭😭

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I feel you. I have one here. maybe some guys are like this. when Mt. Pompeii explodes, he will be the first to feel the heat

I feel that I am exploding soon. He still doesn't feel the heat. Gosh!

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Seems like the two of you need to go for couple therapy. And he’s absolutely right about no screen time

well, focus on the good! he sounds like a good husband. just messy in general which alot of guys are.

Communicate with him about your concerns

I did. His reply either 'those are not his problem, it's ok la, not an issue or ok (acknowledge or doesn't change)

oh no that sounds bad.

Sorry to hear this. :(

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