How to deal with husband who needs 100 reminders to do something?

How do you deal with husbands who need constant reminding to do anything at all? For example, you ask them to do something and you've been asking for months but it never gets done. When you remind, he constantly tries to close the topic and says he will do it, but STILL it never gets done! Of course I'm able to do it myself but that is hardly the solution. Is the only solution me doing everything instead of asking him? Is there any other solution? This has been the theme of our arguments and I've been telling him nicely to please not let me beg multiple times for everything. He says he will try his best but still it happens. And the worst part, when I finally reach my limit (after reminding for a gazillion times), he tries to shut me off and cannot comprehend why I am upset. Instead he starts getting angry cos I'm upset and this goes into full blown argument. It's a vicious cycle and I'm so tired of this. I'm at my wits end. I've tried everything. Speaking nicely, reminding nicely, putting notes.. even doing the things I ask him myself, thinking that he will feel the guilt and won't repeat his behaviour. But still nothing changes! Sometimes (only sometimes) things get done after I get really really upset at him. But I don't want that to be the solution. I don't want arguments to be the solution of him finally doing things. Sigh. If you've experienced this, what have you done that made changes in your partner's behaviour. P/s: I'm due in a month and I'm stressed out cos there's so many things pending and he has not been helping me out, taking the stress away from me. I feel like I'm in charge of everything and my head is going to explode, otherwise nothing gets done. I genuinely want to sit back and just focus on my upcoming birth. #firsttimemom #pleasehelp #advicepls

3 Replies

Frankly , I kinda have a feeling that our husbands don’t have the sense of urgency and think pregnancy is easy peasy… I even have my husband telling me “how tired can it be.. the most tired for a month (confinement period)” .. because go then , after that 1 month, life is back to normal where they work but they don’t realise, baby continue to cry and grow and seek attention and requires feeding… I feel if there is a need, hire a helper and get the helper to help out .. I know it can be very frustrating to see the man not doing anything and maybe it’s our hormones changing.. but it is what it is.. we just have to suck it up and find solution until we given birth and recover and able to think of the next proper move.. for now, focus on the last moments before the little one pop out!

Im due tis end mth and alr in 36 wks. For months i have been asking my hb to pack his stuff to donate/throw. Until today nothing is done. I have to start packing one place and making him do it before he really does. Much as i would love to climb up chair to pack, i tink other ppl r more worried abt me. Haha. I m short of grabbing his stuff n deciding what to donate tbh.

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