This reminds me of my younger days. I used to wish and pray that my parents will die ASAP cause I had no freedom growing up. And being the middle child I was always getting picked on for whatever reason there was. I even ran away from home for 6 times, the longest was a month. Hated my parents to the core. I flung my studies too. My teenage years was an absolute roller-coaster ride. There was one time in 2009 I came home the next morning and literally all of my belongings including my foldable sofa bed was outside my house. My mother didn’t allow me to enter the house, she padlocked it when she saw me. So I stayed in a rented room for about 2 years and life was super tough for me. Fast forward 2012 I decided to come home, took up some course that I didn’t finish and started working. 2014 my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. By then I had already turned over a new leaf and the impact it had on me was really horrible. On days where I used to pray she’d die early, I begged for forgiveness from God that she would be cancer-free. Alas, my prayers were answered and she recovered after 2 years. Now sometimes we do have some disagreements but I just learn to shut off instead of retaliate. It’s better to have her around and have a love-hate relationship than to not have her around, tbh.
Do u want ur kids to wish for u to die sooner, or not take care of you when you’re sick?
I’m not life predictor, I can’t answer you a definite will or will not. But if you believe in karma, then you may already have a sense of guilt. What goes around comes around. Wishing you all the best, and may you live and love healthily and consciously. Learn to let go of negatives and embrace with grace~ May you find your ray of shine one day~
Anonymous