Tit for Tat

Has anyone else hit their child after they hit you? Okay - hear me out. Sometimes I feel staying calm and reasoning with them doesn't work. So once in a while when my toddler hits me, I tap her back - real gently but enough to make her think I hit her that it makes her cry. It's not painful at all, honestly. I just want to show her that hitting is not nice and she wouldn't want it to be done to her. Like this morning, she was pulling her big sister's hair real hard and wouldn't let go even after I calmly told her to let go, which escalated to me raising my voice at her to let go. So I took one of her pigtails and pulled it too. That worked instantly. Raising my threenager is such a challenge to my patience! My eldest wasn't like this at all when she turned three.